Frozen Heart
by Cat Carroll
Summary: Karla isn't happy with being assigned a personal guard, but she's more than intrigued with the new immigrant, Jastian. As their relationship deepens, Karla must make hard choices, testing the bonds of love and courage.
1. Chapter 1

**Frozen Heart**

_By Cat Carroll_

Rated: T

Just when you thought it was safe, Cat returns from the deep…

Heh, sorry, been reading the awesome Meg series by Steven Alten. It's a little on the cheesy side, and I don't care what the real science is because the man makes you believe that there could be 60 foot sharks deep in the oceans. And since I'm a shark junkie, it's making for some good reading.

But I am back with the promised Karla-centric story. This one was a little hard to get started because of the fact its Karla and a romance. At first I was going to play it safe and have her meet a guy that reminded her of Morton and he convinces her that not all men are evil. But rereading some of the Karla scenes in the books, I realized that wasn't being true to character. AB doesn't specifically say it, but she drops enough hints as in "she doesn't like men, at least not in that way…the chances of her taking another man to her bed was almost nonexistent" to indicated that Karla is lesbian.

So, do I play it safe or keep the character true. This is why I like writing about the kids of the main characters so that I don't have to worry about these things. But the fact of the matter is that changing Karla's character that much would be selling her cheap, and I'm not going to disrespect the series to do that to her. So, it's not much a spoiler (considering I've already said this would be Karla-centric and a romance) to figure out that a female love interest is going to be introduced.

What I am taking over half a page in saying is that if you don't like the thought of a story depicting a lesbian relationship, then you might want to hit the back button and wait for the next one which will be male/female. There will not be any graphic sex scenes, but there will be romantic ones. Since you've all been fairly warned, I don't want any reviews about how gross this is or I'm going to Hell for writing it.

For everyone else, I hope you enjoy the story. It's taking place in the same AU as Small Changes, just jumping back in time to starting a few minutes after Jaenelle unleashed her full strength and cleansed the realms.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Chapter 1

Jastian lay on the dusty stone floor of the cave, every muscle in her body shaking. She slowly lifted her head, her vision blurring, clearing, blurring again as she looked around the Secret Coven's refuge. She tried to push herself up, trembling body threatening to collapse at any second, and then sat against the wall for support. She created a ball of witchlight and even that bit of Craft was almost painful. Her vision cleared and she could hear the whimpers and sobs from the other Black Widows that made up the coven. Someone asked if it was Dorothea...had she found a new way to attack? Should they try to run and hide in a new place? Jastian didn't think so. If that attack had come from Dorothea, then they were all nothing more than walking carrion and there was nothing left that could stop that bitch.

"Marguerite!" The scream pierced Jastian's head and she looked over where the young witch had been just before the spiraling power had blown through the cave and coven. Where a witch had once been, there was now just a empty set of clothes on the stone. Another scream of despair as two witches deep in the back began to cry and scream that they were broken, their Jewels now so much powder in empty settings.

Broken, gone, and not a hint of the power lingering that had done so much damage in a matter of seconds. The Secret Coven was the last refuge for Black Widows that refused to bow before the Hayll's power. The women there were very adept at hiding and protecting themselves and the place they were staying. But this power had torn through all of their defenses without slowing. Jastian wondered why it had only affected three witches here when it could have blown apart all of their inner barriers and shattered them.

She slowly pushed herself to her feet. Jastian reminded herself that she was pureblood Eyrien and Eyriens did not cringe in the - oooh, the cave was spinning again - corner when in danger. Her gold eyes fell back onto the pile of clothes again and it made her think of who had been wearing them. Marguerite. One of the witches that had started to do more that just mutter that maybe they should strike a deal with Dorothea. The other two witches, the broken ones, had started to agree with her. They were younger girls from short-lived races, and were tired of always being on the move. They were still scared from the last time they had been attacked, and that more than anything was making them agree with Marguerite.

They had been living in a decent house outside of a small village. They had been there for over a year when the Hayllian soldiers had attacked. If their defenses had been a little run down...if Jastian didn't wear the Red...things would have been different. Jastian had always thought it suspicious how the guards had found them and had begun to suspect that there was a traitor in their midst, but Trista, the coven leader, had asked her not to look further. That had been a little over a month ago, and now Jastian wondered what Trista had seen in her webs of dreams and visions that made her not want to seek out and eliminate a traitor.

Jastian took a step away from the wall. The cave swayed for a moment, but then stilled. That was good. She took a few more steps and managed to stay on her feet. That was even better. Trista was still sitting on the floor, trying to calm and comfort the frightened witches. Nobody seemed hurt, maybe a few scratches from hitting the stone floor, but other than one missing and two broken witches, everyone was fine. Jastian went to Trista and knelt beside her.

"Do you know what that was?" she asked. Trista looked at her, expression bleak.

"We saw in our webs," she said distantly. "The howling of rage and celebration." She stared directly at the empty clothes on the ground. Her eyes hardened. "And all the debts are paid."

Jastian's whole body went cold. For three days they'd woven webs of vision and all gotten the same cryptic answers. "I'm going to check the valley," she said, wondering how wide-spread the destruction was. Trista nodded and Jastian stood, leaving the cave.

As she walked out, she glanced behind her and froze. When the Secret Coven had been forced into the cave in the Askavi Mountains, they had wrapped powerful layers of illusion spells across the entrance. It looked just like part of the mountain, and if someone touched it, the web would draw the person's mind in, making them think they were touching stone. Now the entrance was bare, all of the illusions ripped away. What in the name of Hell did this, Jastian thought. She sent out a psychic probe and detected nobody anywhere near them. The cave would be safe for now, but they needed to get the entrance illusions repaired immediately.

Jastian spread her wings and launched herself into the sky. The massive storm that had been building all night had broken with the dawn. Although the sky was overcast and grumbling, there was no hint of the destruction that had been promised the night before. Unless, Jastian thought, that hadn't been a natural storm at all. The thought made her shiver. She could clearly remember that spiral of power biting into her and sincerely hoped she never, ever, felt anything like that again. She shivered again and then banked, wrapping herself in a Red sight and psychic shields as she headed to the nearest town in the valley.

When Dorothea had made her announcement that it had been the High Lord of Hell and his sons who had been the cause of all her evil, there had been great rejoicing among many in the coven. She wasn't going to pursue them anymore, some said. There weren't many of the coven that were of the long-lived races. Jastian was over 1,100 years old and knew what Dorothea had been up to for the last millennia. For some reason, she doubted that the pleasure that bitch had taken in destroying Terreille had been caused by the High Lord. She knew too many witches broken by Dorothea's command to blindly believe. And her instincts had been right. Several of the coven witches had left and gone home. Jastian knew that at least two were dead and one was broken. The other one never made it home. And then the coven was attacked, forcing them to flee into the remote mountains.

The coven had been safe up in the mountains. Jastian had been able to get the supplies they needed from villages in the valley. There were lots of Eyriens here and she blended with the crowds. It had made it easier to hear news as well. There had been so many rumors and gossip that Jastian wasn't sure what to believe. War with Kaeleer. A new Queen in Ebon Askavi. Some said she was owned by the evil High Lord. Others said she didn't exist at all. Danger, death, more women missing, men being shaved, whispers of things to come.

Jastian reached the edge of the first town. It didn't look damaged. She sent out a probe and gasped at what she felt. It had to be wrong. The storm was playing with her senses. That was the only plausible explanation.

Or else over half the Blood in that busy, bustling town were now…gone.

Jastian could sense maybe half the people she could before. And the rest…oh, the rest. She came in closer, and now could hear the cries and screams. So many were broken. Others simply vanished. Clothes lying in the street, just like Marguerite. A precious few were wandering in a daze with no loss to their power at all. And then Jastian realized what else was missing. There was no psychic feel at all coming from the Queen that ruled this village. The Queen was among the vanished, and her First Circle with her.

Jastian rose back in the air, catching an Opal wind to get the next town faster. Again, devastation. Animals and buildings were untouched, but the people were gone, broken, or untouched. After stopping a third time at a smaller village, Jastian finally noticed the pattern. It was Dorothea's followers and backers that were injured. The males who had been twisted and the pet Queens were all gone. Anyone who had actively been part of Dorothea's games was gone. Those that had been touched, but not fully corrupted were broken. Only the few that had stayed out of Dorothea's games and still tried to act in an honorable way had been left unharmed.

Jastian flew back up into the mountain, alighting on a high ledge that looked beyond the mountains and down into the flatlands stretching out as far as the eye could see. She descended to the Red and sent out a psychic probe much further than she would have ever dared a few hours before. As the information began to come back, she had to grab the solid rock of the mountain to stay on her feet. It was staggering. She couldn't tell numbers, but all over thousands of the Blood were gone. The loss of power was staggering.

And liberating as well.

Slowly Jastian turned until she could see the Black Mountain. Ebon Askavi. There was no doubt now. The only way this was possible was if a Queen ruled there for the first time in millennia. A Queen at the head of the most powerful army in the Realms. Other rumors had said that some people had been able to escape to Kaeleer. Although Dorothea's pets said that the Shadow Realm was more myth than real, Jastian now thought that if there was a great and powerful Queen in Ebon Askavi, she wasn't ruling from Terreille, but from Kaeleer.

Kaeleer, she thought, launching herself into the sky and heading back to the cave. That's where I need to go. If I ever want to know what really happened today, what was powerful enough to strip Dorothea of every ally, Kaeleer is where I'll find the answers. She wrapped a sight shield around herself as she banked, heading back to the cave. She would report to Trista, help the other members of the coven, and somehow, she would begin searching for a way into that mythic and strange land.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Lucivar Yaslana hated the service fairs. Loathed them as a reminder of when he was a slave. There had been a gap of two years after the war between Terreille and Kaeleer, but now that most of the civil wars in Terreille were ending, the fairs had restarted. In some ways the fair was more pitiful than before. They had been full of people who were frightened of what waited back in Terreille, scared of Dorothea and her puppet Queens, and twisted males that saw women as creatures that needed to be broken and put into their service as young as possible. Now they were full of people who were exhausted with the fighting that had broken out after Dorothea and Hekatah's taint had been purged from the Realms. Landens in many Territories had risen up against the Blood and it had taken years for the fighting to calm. So many deaths, so much blood, and it was all written on the faces of the people who were desperate to find a place here in Kaeleer.

Some Territories were recovering, true. Cassidy was doing a good job in Dena Nehele. But not every Territory had the luxury of a Kaeleer born Queen to help them recover and remember how to live by Protocol. And so the influx of people at the service fairs continued.

Lucivar wouldn't be here at all if it hadn't been for Karla and Jaenelle. A month ago Karla's Master of the Guard had come to him with a request to create a small personal guard for Karla. She didn't have a Consort or a First Escort, someone who would always be with her, and there were small pockets in Glacia where the changes that Hobert had tried to cause were still thought of with approval. The Master of the Guard had heard whispers and rumors that Karla needed a male council to "help guide her" since she didn't have a complete triangle. Although the worst of the people had vanished in the Great Purge as it had come to be called, there were too many left for the Master to be comfortable with. He wanted a personal guard, trained by Lucivar, who would be with her at all times. No specific threats had been made, but a good Master of the Guard expected threats and planned for the unexpected.

Lucivar had agreed and they'd planned for a five man team. That way someone would always be on call, but the others wouldn't be in constant attendance. He had found four easily enough, and Jaenelle had approved his choices, but the fifth person was proving difficult. Finally Jaenelle had called him to the Keep. He'd gone to her suite and pulled up short when he saw her in a black spidersilk gown. Her sapphire eyes pinned him in a way he hadn't seen in a long time, making him think about a chasm deep in the abyss and a giant Ebony web that spanned that chasm. She had stepped to the side and he could see a tangled web of visions and dreams that Black Widows would spin when they needed answers.

"You need to go to the service fair in Goth," she said in a tone no man would dare argue against. "Seek a warrior who is not a warrior. That is the one for Karla."

It had taken every bit of Lucivar's training, discipline, and sheer Eyrien arrogance to keep his knees from turning to jelly. Nobody was supposed to know about the team. Even _Karla_ didn't know because none of them wanted to hear her screeches of rejection until it was too late for her to change things. "There's an immigrant we can trust?" he asked.

Jaenelle turned back to her web. To him, it was tangled strands of silk which infuriated him that he couldn't read what those strands said. "When you find the one," she said, "you'll know. And yes, this immigrant will be worthy of trust."

A warrior, but not a warrior. As Lucivar had wandered through the fair, he cursed Cat a dozen times for not providing a little more detail. Race would have been a nice start. He'd gone through the short-lived races, but none of the men were anyone he felt he could trust with Karla. At least not on short notice. He didn't even consider a Hayllian. It didn't matter that he was half-Hayllian himself. That race had been the most decimated by the Purge, and he wasn't giving a one of them a chance to rebuild any of the Hundred Families. Finally he'd come to the Eyrien's area.

Some of the males recognized him when he wandered in. A few sent their women and children back into the tents, while others sneered at him, seeing him only as a half-breed bastard. Lucivar recognized a few of them from the hunting camps when he was a youth and wondered if any of them knew he wasn't an immigrant. He would normally wait for a bit at the front and let the males approach him, but he wasn't looking to bring a bunch of people back with him since he was going to be concentrating on the security team and not have time to settle immigrants. He was looking for the right immigrant, and the best place to find a warrior would be at the practice circle.

He wrapped an Ebon-gray shield around himself, barely a finger's width off of his skin as he strode through the middle of the camp to where the practice circle would be. Creating the shield was as automatic as breathing, especially when he didn't know how the people there would accept his presence. Not that he gave a damn if they were happy, but he would prefer to avoid a fight until he'd looked at all the warriors and had a chance to see if the right one for Karla was there.

When he got to the circle, a man and a youth were sparring. The boy was quick, Lucivar thought, seeing him use speed and agility to get out of a situation that clearly favored the larger, more muscled warrior. They clashed, moved, whirled, and clashed again. Finally the man made the slightest error and the boy used it ruthlessly. Within a second, the larger man was in the dust with a sparring stick at his throat. Lucivar froze for a moment when he realized what he was seeing. For a boy, he had a nice set of tits behind the leather vest he was wearing. A woman, Lucivar thought. Not a boy, but a woman with damn decent fighting skills. A warrior, but not a warrior. She had real skills, but the males wouldn't accept them. Already the man on the ground was getting up, laughing how he let her win, how any man in his right mind let the female win. She was laughing good-naturedly with them, but the laughter didn't touch her eyes.

Jastian felt someone watching her as she sparred in the practice circle. The thought of another representative from a "respectable" Red Moon house had spurred her into a fury that caused her to win the fight faster than she had intended. Luckily, the man she was fighting had played off that he had allowed her to win. She went with it knowing that it was better to be underestimated than for a potential enemy to know your real strength. And that she had to think of these males as potential enemies was scratching her temper even further.

She'd worked damn hard to get this far, even though she wasn't sure now why she was supposed to be here. In the last two years she had gotten her answers. It had been Witch who cleansed the Realms. She had cleaned the taint of Dorothea, but there had been so much destruction that only more destruction could follow. Jastian had done her best to protect the other witches in the Secret Coven, but the coven was falling apart as news spread of individual Territories rebuilding and returning to some semblance of order. Many of the witches in the coven had returned to their homes. But her webs had been clear that she needed to go to Kaeleer, was needed in Kaeleer.

So far the only ones who had expressed a need for her were males that were destined to end up on the pointy end of her favorite knife. Bastards. There weren't a lot of Eyrien whores so the men from the Red Moon houses kept going on and on about how much money she would make since she would be unusual. She knew she would be. She was an attractive woman with a smoking hot rack, and wings for spice, of course she would be great at the Red Moon houses. Except for the fact that she'd kill all of her clients before she'd let them touch her. That would probably be considered a minor issue.

After her opponent fell and she took the good-natured barbs, she turned to give the watcher a cold stare that had turned away the last few whore-masters. Her breath caught in her throat. Ebon-gray Jewels. He was no Red Moon representative. Although she had never met Lucivar Yaslana, she had heard of him. Sweet Darkness, who hadn't heard of him? And he had been the one to watch her intently.

Jastian had dropped her Red shield when she had wiped off the sweat, well, pretended to have sweat to wipe off, after her sparring match. As she started to walk towards Yaslana, the shield reformed without any conscious thought on her part, riding just above her skin. She could see a couple of males approaching like they were going to get in between her and Yaslana, but hesitated when he shot them a glance that would turn fire to stone.

She stopped a few feet from him. Mother Night, the man was wearing a wedding ring. She'd head about the Courts he'd destroyed, the witches who had left his bed maimed and bloodied, and some woman had actually married him? She must be dark-Jeweled enough to have some control and from a family powerful enough to give him pause. That was the only kind of woman that stood a chance surviving the man she had heard about.

"I'm Lucivar Yaslana," Lucivar introduced himself politely. "Warlord Prince of Ebon Rih." He was doing his best trying not to smile. Oh, this one was perfect. Her psychic scents were giving off flashes of concern and fear, none of which registered on her face which held all of the arrogance natural to her race.

"Jastian Dellamar," she replied evenly. Warlord Prince of Ebon Rih? A person in Kaeleer could go far.

"You're alone?"

A flash of anger on her face, there and gone in a second. "There are no rules against a female immigrating alone." She gestured towards the practice circle with her sparring stick. "I can take care of myself."

"I have no doubt," came the mild reply. "Can you take care of others though?"

Lucivar saw her fight to keep her face blank. "It depends on who the person is," she finally said. He could taste the trace of sadness in her voice and wondered who had refused to come to Kaeleer with her.

"Would you serve a Queen?"

The flash of fury was there and gone in a second. Lucivar could almost tell himself that he was mistaken if it weren't for the guarded way she held herself. Well, she was from Terreille. Service there was far different that service in Kaeleer.

"You want me to service a Queen?" Her voice was low, but there was real heat in it now. Lucivar knew to be careful. Even with the disparity in Jewels, he was dealing with a Black Widow. Oh, she had trimmed her nails and painted them, but was related to too many of them to mistake the psychic scent of a Black Widow.

"I am forming a personal guard for a Queen here," he said. "I want people who are willing to be absolutely loyal and guard her with their own lives if need be."

His statement relaxed her a little. "I thought in Kaeleer everyone loved their Queens."

"Glacia was first on Dorothea's list," Lucivar said, unable to keep the growl of anger out of his voice. Even after two years, he was still furious over the attack on Karla. If Daemon had been a few minutes later, they would have lost her for good. "She made sure people were in place that started to whisper that Karla needed a male council to guide her, and that maybe a natural Black Widow shouldn't be allowed to rule. You lived in Terreille; you know how that bitch operated to soften a Territory."

Jastian nodded. "And I assume there are still those that whisper?"

Lucivar gave her a hard look. "They can whisper all they want. But if anyone wants to do more than whisper, I want a guard that will bring me their head in a bucket."

A small smile crept across Jastian's face. It was so vicious that Lucivar was reminded of when the cats went hunting. Especially the ones that hunted "stupid meat" as they called intruding humans. "Why me?" she asked.

Lucivar gave her a smile that was well matched for hers. "My sister is a Black Widow," he said too softly. "She sent me here to find you."

Jastian thought about the web she had woven the night before. She had been hiding the fact she was a Black Widow because even now people were frightened of that caste of witches. Their knowledge was too deep and their skills so very dangerous. She had seen a cold land in her web. Some of the other things she had seen had been confusing and she was still puzzled over them, but she knew without a doubt she was meant to protect and guard this Queen.

"When will she be here so that I can sign her contract?" Jastian asked, accepting what was being offered.

Lucivar laughed. "Not that fast," he said with a grin. "You'll sign your contract with me. Then I'm going to train your ass off until the guard unit is skilled to my satisfaction. Once you all are ready, I'll transfer your contract to Karla."

Oh, the look on her face. Lucivar was well-skilled in getting a witch's temper sparking. He was known for it in fact. And the witch in front of him was seconds away from hissing and spitting. He gave her an arrogant grin. "I'll see you at the signing desk in an hour," he said, and then turned, leaving the other males to deal with the furious witch. He thought about Karla and all of her sarcastic comments, snide remarks about wing spans and proportions, little pranks and just plain out bitchiness. Sticking her with this Eyrien was the best revenge he could have ever devised.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Jastian silently blessed the maid who had drawn a hot bath while she was finishing training with Lucivar and her new guard team. She vanished her clothes and slid into the hot water. She would have removed them so they could be laundered, but she wasn't sure if she would be able to straighten up again if she bent over to take her boots off. She wasn't sure if Yaslana was going to kill them all before declaring them ready. But at least she hadn't been the first to puke on the exercise field.

It was easy to flow between hating, admiring and respecting Lucivar Yaslana. The man never missed anything. He was demanding and worked his people until they were beyond ready to drop. On the other side, he was incredibly patient, willing to demonstrate moves over and over, and he worked just as hard as the people under him. Even in the short time she'd been in Kaeleer, Jastian knew she had already improved far more than she could have on her own, or even under any other Eyrien she knew for that matter. Her abilities with a war blade had accelerated and she had learned more about a knife in the few weeks she'd been here than in the last 500 years in Terreille. Lady Surreal had been an expert assassin in Terreille and had no problem teaching other females how to handle an unwanted male.

Yes, she was learning a lot and glad for every bit. But there was always a price. For one, she ached at the end of every day. Every muscle whimpered by the time they were released from the practice field. And second, they had to stay at SaDiablo Hall.

She wasn't sure if that was a reward or a price, really. The place was intimidating. Not that she would say that out loud. As a matter of fact, when they had driven up in the Coach, she knew she was supposed to be impressed. Instead she had looked at Lucivar point blank and asked if there was enough space for her to have her own room. Davon, one of the other guard members had been horrified at her cavalier attitude. Lucivar had been amused. However, Jastian had kept her mouth shut when they had gone into the Hall. The place was gorgeous. She could feel the innate power pulsing from every stone, calling to her own dark-Jeweled power. The Hall would make the welcome feel at home and the unwelcome too frightened to want to stay.

A person had to be strong and determined to live comfortably at SaDiablo Hall, Jastian thought as she soaked in the tub. Her toe poked at the small perforated metal ball at the bottom of the tub. Between the hot water and the herbs in the ball, her aches were slowly melting from the muscles. To live there one not only had to deal with the darkness of the place, but also not panicking when coming around a corner and seeing an 800 pound cat staring back at you. Or a wolf playing with her pups in the garden. And Jastian didn't care how jaded she was, when two unicorns trotted across the lawn, she could only gape like an idiot. And of course, all of them were kindred and talked to the humans. Jastian thought she could handle anything in Kaeleer. The first morning when a small dog asked her if she would like a cup of coffee, she almost packed her bags and headed back to Terreille.

Even once you got over the kindred, there were still the human occupants. Daemon Sadi. She'd heard of the man before as one of Dorothea's pets. Her first instinct was to get as far from one of Dorothea's man as she could, but the Hall wasn't a place of fear. None of the servants had that haunted look of the abused. None of the kindred were there by force. Everyone seemed...happy. Honestly, the only person that anyone seemed afraid of was Mrs. Beale. Jastian hadn't met her yet, but if the woman was enough to put an Ebon-gray Warlord Prince on his best behavior, then Jastian knew to stay out of her way. Despite the presence of Sadi, or maybe because of Sadi's protective presence, the Hall was a relatively happy place. It made Jastian rethink what she knew of Dorothea's people. Maybe Sadi had been more of a victim than Jastian could have suspected before.

And then there was Lady Angelline.

Jastian could handle the kindred. She could deal with the domineering males surrounding her. She had kept her cool in battle even when faced with insurmountable odds. But when she met Lady Angelline the day after she'd come to the Hall and saw those summer-sky eyes turn to sapphire, she had _known_ that she was in a room with the most dangerous person she'd ever faced. For several heartbeats Jastian forgot how to breathe as those eyes pierced into her soul. Hell's Fire, Mother Night, and may the Darkness be Merciful, she had thought, fighting to hold her ground and knowing she was losing. She remembered that power, that terribly dark power that had done so much destruction in such a little time and now its keeper was dead in front of her.

"This is my sister and Queen, Jaenelle Angelline," Lucivar said, his mild voice a warning to her. Jastian knew she needed to be polite, but couldn't pull herself out of the abyss hiding behind those sapphire eyes. They seemed to be searching her for answers, answers she would give if she just knew the question.

Then the sapphire gaze broke, her eyes changing back to ordinary blue as she glared at Lucivar. "Former Queen," she corrected.

"Need to see the contract _again_ Lady?" he asked. "I think it's still in the fountain."

Jastian didn't know the language Lady Angelline replied in, but from the way Lucivar blinked she knew the Lady had managed something wonderfully obscene. She looked back at Jastian. "Isn't it wonderful trying to argue sense with someone of his caste?"

Jastian wasn't sure how to respond since most of the Warlord Princes that had gotten close to her over the last few centuries had been there to kill her. "I can't imagine anyone wanting to leave Witch's service," she finally said.

Jaenelle gave her a playful glare. "You're supposed to agree with your fellow Sister."

Jastian gave her a small smile. "Not while I still have to deal with him on the practice field."

Jaenelle's laughter rang out through the room. "Welcome to Kaeleer," she said. "I think you and Karla will commiserate well together."

Was it Jastian's imagination or did Lucivar relax slightly? She didn't get the chance to say anything because the door to the garden opened and Daemon Sadi entered, holding a young Eyrien boy. The boy immediately began to squirm, little wings flapping.

"Papa!" he shrieked. "Papa!"

Sadi let the boy go and he flew into Lucivar's arms. He immediately began to babble about playing with Unka Daemon and the wolves and Unka Daemon fly. Lucivar gave Daemon a pained look. Daemon glared and pointed at the boy.

"Your next one better be a girl," he growled. "If he pisses off of one more roof, he's banned from Dhemlan."

"Bastard…"

"He showed the wolf pups how to do it!" Daemon snarled.

Jastian couldn't stop herself from laughing any more than she could have stopped the rivers from running. She might have felt bad, but Jaenelle was doubled over howling with laughter, making the little boy giggle too.

"I love puppies," he said proudly.

Lucivar secured his hold on his son. "I'm going to take him home," he said with as much dignity as circumstances would allow.

"Mama needs a present!" the little boy declared. Jastian thought it was a sweet statement and didn't understand why Lucivar paled. He gave his son a sharp look.

"What have you done?" he growled.

The child just gave his father a darling smile. "Please, Papa?"

Lucivar glanced up at Jaenelle and Daemon. "I've got to get back to eyrie before Marian," he said, sounding desperate.

Jaenelle made a funny sound and Daemon appeared to be straining. "I'll see you at the Keep tomorrow," Daemon said and Lucivar rushed out of the room. Seconds later both Daemon and Jaenelle were doubled over with laughter. Jastian smiled slightly, not sure what the joke was.

Jaenelle finally calmed enough to explain. "Daemonar found out that his father sometimes gives his mother a present when she's mad at him. So now when he's done something really bad, he asks to get Mama a present." She started giggling again. "The last time he suggested a present, he had played "chase the chickens" with half a dozen wolf puppies all through the eyrie. Someone had shown him how to do an aural shield so nobody knew he was playing when he was supposed to be taking a nap while Marian was in the garden. Lucivar came home, saw the house covered with chicken bits and his son covered in feathers, and before he could start yelling, Daemonar said they needed to get Mama a present in a hurry."

Jastian couldn't help a laugh. "That sounds like an Eyrien boy." She gave Jaenelle a small smile. "I have two brothers. My mother swore she wouldn't survive either of them." For a moment Jaenelle's eyes turned to sapphire and Jastian knew they saw more than she would like them to. Then she was simply Jaenelle again as she stood.

"Lucivar wants us to work with you in the evenings with Craft. I'll be honing your Hourglass skills. Daemon will work with offensive spells."

Normally Jastian would have protested that her Craft was just fine. Better than fine. But considering that she was still reluctant to let anyone know she was a Black Widow, she was willing to bet there were gaps in her education. Jaenelle openly wore her hourglass pendant with its gold dust sealed at the bottom. Jastian had one that was heavily shielded so that it was invisible in her drawer. Besides, only a fool would pass up the opportunity to learn under Witch.

"I'll see you in my workroom in an hour," Jaenelle said as she walked out of the room. Jastian noticed the way Daemon's eyes followed her. In Terreille, she would have warned the witch to run, that a predator was stalking her. But his eyes were not only possessive, but protective. And then those gold eyes turned to her.

Jastian wasn't prepared for that punch of sexual heat that rolled off of him. With other people in the room, it hadn't been as noticeable, but when his full attention was on her, she could feel the waves of sensuality that flowed from him as naturally as breathing. He moved with smooth feline grace to the couch and settled himself, motioning her to sit in the chair across from him. Jastian's legs were shaking as her body reacted to all that heat and desire. And the man wasn't even trying. No wonder he was called The Sadist. If he unleashed the full force of that sexuality, any woman would be on her knees, begging him for whatever pleasures he would grant.

"Lucivar said he was impressed with how much you've progressed," Daemon said, his voice a low rumble.

Jastian gave herself a mental slap. Stay disciplined, she thought. If he wants something sexual from you, well, you didn't sign a contract with him and can leave the Hall at will. Of course, rules of contracts didn't always apply to a Black Jeweled Warlord Prince.

"I'm pleased to hear that," she replied evenly.

"I was surprised when he told me about you," Daemon said, "Most Eyrien women don't believe in learning to use weapons."

Jastian cocked an eyebrow at him. "I'm Red-Jeweled Black Widow from Terreille," she said. "You're from that Realm. A witch in my position had to either submit to Dorothea, get broken by a male when her strength is discovered, or learn how to fight. My father began teaching me how to defend myself after my Birthright Ceremony and I received an Opal Jewel. He knew that males would want to break me as soon as possible and wanted to give me enough training that I could protect myself until I received my Offering Jewel and came into my full strength."

Daemon studied her for a long minute. It would have been uncomfortable, but after being reviewed by Witch, no stare would ever make her squirm again. "Karla isn't like any of the Queens in Terreille," he said. "I spent most of my life going from one Court to the next. It wasn't until I came to Kaeleer that I learned what a Queen was supposed to be like. Karla will be a pain in the ass at every opportunity over having a personal guard, but she is a good Queen."

"I promised to serve her well," Jastian said softly, understanding the meaning behind his words. There simply weren't enough good Queens in the Realms to lose even one. "I know males have a protective instinct and desire to serve that females don't, but I can assure you that I am more than capable of protecting someone when I've given my word."

Daemon seemed like he wanted to say more, but instead only nodded. "In that case, good luck with Lucivar. He's a mean prick on the training field, but he's the best."

Jastian managed a weak smile. "Training field? I thought it was the slow-torture-until-you-die field."

Daemon laughed and promised to send her an herb to put into her bath that was guaranteed to help with sore muscles. She had left the interview and barely gotten to her room before she collapsed into the nearest chair, every muscle shaking. Facing an army had been less frightening than being interviewed by those two. Jastian had no doubt that if either of them had refused her; she would have been out of Kaeleer before sunset. But she suspected that they had accepted her and she would be personal guard to the Queen of Glacia. And true to his word, the next evening, when every muscle was aching after a day of training, she had come to her room and there had been a hot bath waiting for her with a small ball full of herbs sitting at the bottom of the tub, and the herbed tub had been waiting for her every night since.

However, the tub Jastian was currently in was starting to cool. She shook herself out of her thoughts and thought about using Craft to heat the water back up, but then thought about the time and decided against it. She needed to dress and meet Jaenelle this evening to work on illusion spells that could be made quickly, and used with devastating results on an enemy. It was the advanced version of what she already knew, but given a far sharper edge. There was also the challenge of working with Twilight's Dawn. One minute the Jewel resonated with her Red. The next second, Jastian would have sworn she was standing beside a Summer-Sky Jeweled witch, and the next second Jaenelle felt like the Gray. She had gotten such a cold response when she had broached the subject on the Jewel's origin that she realized that topic was off-limits.

Jastian got out of the tub, feeling much better than when she came in. She looked at herself in the mirror, smiling at the changes the hard workouts had already caused. She would never bulge with muscle, but she was far more toned than she had been when she first got to Kaeleer. She knew she was physically stronger and Lucivar had said he was going to start working with her on combat while flying next week. Looking in the mirror, she thought she was looking better than before. She wondered if...no, she wasn't going to think about that. Wasn't going to think about how anyone else would look at her new physique.

Jastian began to towel herself off quickly, wanting to focus on the task at hand and not the past. Time to get dressed, Craft lesson, dinner, maybe some reading tonight, and absolutely no thinking about anything else. She used a bit of Craft to braid her hair and then wrap the braid high on her head so that her hair was completely out of the way. She went into her bedroom and suddenly hesitated, head cocked. She was almost sure she had heard something in the distance. She took a tunic top out of the closet and started to slide it over her head when a woman's scream nearly startled it out of her hands.

Jastian tore out of her room to the sound of the scream, not caring about how little she had on. Shields wrapped around her without conscious thought. She rounded a corner as another furious screech came from down the hall. She couldn't hear what was being yelled, but then she saw a man with his hand on the arm of a blonde woman. Jastian didn't stop to ask questions. She couldn't put a protective shield around the woman while the male still held her, but she didn't drop her sight shield until she dove at the man, slamming herself into him.

The man flailed back, both him and the woman hitting the ground, but he let go of her. Jastian took the previous second to throw a shield around her, and a few seconds later the man was pinned to the floor with an Eyrien war blade at his throat as others came running into the hall.

"Jastian?" Jaenelle's question was cautious. "Why are you attacking Lord Kemmerick?"

"He was attacking that Lady," Jastian snarled, fighting to keep from slicing the man's head off right there.

"He wasn't attacking me," the witch with short spiky blonde hair snarled. She sat up, rubbing her elbow where it had hit the stone floor.

"You were screaming," Jastian said a thread of uncertainty in her voice. Someone, she thought it might be Sadi, snorted back a laugh.

"Yelling is Karla's favorite communication method," Jaenelle said. "I doubt she was being attacked by her Master of the Guard."

Karla. Queen. Master of the Guard. The man she would soon report to.

Oh, shit.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Sorry for the delay in the chapter. This was a hard one to write for some reason. I had written it, hated it, couldn't figure it out, and then finally got it. I had Karla totally wrong. You'd think she'd be easy to write, but she's tough. And if I have her wrong in this chapter, the rest of the story is shot. So I rewrote it and while not perfect, it's a lot better than it was.

So, here is the next chapter. Hopefully the next few will come out quicker. And thank you to all who have read and reviewed. I love hearing from you all!

*~*~*~*~*~*

Chapter 4

Karla had been suspicious when Galen, her Master of the Guard, had escorted her to the Hall from Glacia. She normally traveled the Winds with a kindred companion when invited to the Hall. A proper human escort was only required when she was making an "official" visit. This was just a normal visit, not the Queen of Glacia paying a call to the former Queen of Ebon Askavi and the Warlord Prince of Dhemlan. Of course the bastard had waited until he was escorting her to her suite before telling her the real reason he had accompanied her.

She was a Gray-Jeweled Queen! The only males in the Realms stronger than she was Lucivar and Daemon, and it wasn't like she needed to worry about _them_. And he'd been planning this for _months_ without telling her! Ohhhh, she knew one man who would be looking for a new job when they got back to Glacia. Her declaration that she was more that capable of taking care of herself came out as more:

"DAMN YOUR HIDE I DO NOT NEED A BUNCH OF BABYSITTERS YOU STUPID SEWER-RAT!" she had screamed at him. Galen had been expecting the yelling, but was still trying to get her to her room so she could yell in private and he could get Prince Yaslana to come up and explain.

"I AM NOT GOING TO HAVE A BUNCH OF MALES AROUND ME DAY AND NIGHT AND THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO IT!" she shrieked as they came into the corridor near her room at the Hall.

"Lady, there are still those who supported your Uncle," Galen said in a low voice, trying to make her understand. Which of course, he had as much chance of making Karla be reasonable as he did making the sun shine in Hell. "If you had a Consort, or weren't a Black Widow, things might be different, but as long as those fools are out there, you are in danger."

"NO! NO! NO!" she shrieked, refusing to listen to reason or logic. The thought of never being alone, males around her all the time...oh, it made her sick just thinking about it. She didn't have long to think. The hallway was still echoing with her last shout when...something...slammed into Galen, knocking them all to the floor.

Karla felt a Red shield encircle her - weird, Galen wore the Green - and then the, well, fight, she supposed she should call it, was over. Karla found herself looking up a leg made of roughly twelve feet of smooth sun-kissed skin, tunic barely covering thighs and rear. Dark membranous wings flicked and snapped back with fury, and lovely features locked in the fiercest expression she'd ever seen on an Eyrien woman's face before. She was holding a war blade like she knew how to use it, only it was pointed at Galen's neck.

The corridor was filling with people and Jaenelle asked the Eyrien woman something. Karla used the distraction to carefully slide a Gray shield over her Master of the Guard so that he would be protected if that blade came down.

"He was attacking that Lady," the Eyrien woman spat out.

"He wasn't attacking me," Karla said, sitting up. Her elbow was hurting from where it hit the ground. She rubbed it absently, letting Healing power flow into her elbow to prevent a bruise.

The Eyrien shot Karla a look. "You were screaming," she said. Karla felt a moment of uncharacteristic pity for her. She looked new. If she was Eyrien and new, it meant she was from Terreille. A scream from a witch in Terreille was a lot different than a scream from a Kaeleer witch.

"Yelling is Karla's favorite communication method," Jaenelle said. "I doubt she was being attacked by her Master of the Guard."

The poor woman's horror was painfully obvious as she jumped back, vanishing her war blade. "Lady Karla, Lord Kemmerick, my deepest apologies," she sputtered. Karla dropped the Gray shield as she stood back up and the Eyrien used Craft to lift Galen back to his feet. "When I heard Lady Karla scream, I...I..."

"It's okay," Galen said kindly. He rubbed his neck to make sure everything was still attached. "If this is how you'll treat anyone who attacks the Queen, then I feel very good about having her in your care."

Karla glared at Galen. "What do you mean her care?" she hissed.

Jaenelle stepped forward, taking Karla's arm. "Darling," she said, "This is Lady Jastian. Lucivar has been training her to be in your personal guard."

Karla took a good look at the Eyrien woman. The arrogance as natural to her race as breathing had asserted itself over embarrassment and she boldly eyed Karla right back. "Are you going to get jumpy every time I yell?" Karla demanded.

"Probably," Jastian said with a grin. "But I suspect your Master of the Guard will let me know who to not attack when you're yelling."

"It would be a shorter list for the people she doesn't yell at on a regular basis," Lord Kemmerick grumbled. Karla shot him a daggered glare.

"I'm not finished with you," she snarled. "You went behind my back and neither you nor that horse's ass even asked my opinion on people I'm supposed to allow around me constantly."

"My horse's ass of a brother did ask me," Jaenelle said. The hint of midnight in her voice made everyone dead silent. Karla slowly turned and looked into her friend's sapphire eyes. "As you saw a ring, I saw a guard. Trust Jastian. She is needed."

Jaenelle's eyes lost that sapphire bite and Jastian let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding. How in the name of Hell did the people around here live? Jastian still had to fight to keep from running or peeing herself when those eyes went sapphire and that sepulcher voice poured forth.

Jaenelle's eyes went back to their normal blue and she smiled. "Jastian, why don't we skip the lesson for tonight? You and Karla could have a chat before dinner."

"Of course, Lady," Jastian said, glad that this wasn't going to end badly. In a Court in Terreille, she would have earned a whipping at the least for attacking a Queen's Master of the Guard, no matter what the provocation. Of course, this was Kaeleer, and so far a whipping wasn't seen as a dinner entertainment here. She bowed politely to Karla. "If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'll finish dressing."

Karla nodded and Jastian left quickly, going to her room and cursed steadily as she dressed. She had hoped to meet her Queen with dignity and respect and with pants on. Instead she had managed to attack the man she would report to, flash her ass to her Queen and amuse half of SaDiablo Hall's inhabitants. Oh well. She'd had worse first meetings before. At least this one hadn't ended with a bride in a pig sty. She checked herself one last time in the mirror and then went quickly to Karla's room.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Karla paced in her room, remembering her childhood in Glacia where she was constantly surrounded by "proper Ladies" after her mother and aunt had died. Their voices echoed in her head, dozens of different women, but all with the same pinched lips and sharp, critical eyes. Oh, Karla, why do you have to be so different look at that young Lady don't you want to be like her why must you be so difficult don't you know that you need to please males to be pleased please try and act ladylike don't you want to fit in…

Karla almost missed the light knock on her door, cutting into her train of thoughts. She was used to Eyriens who would just barge on in. True, Marian would knock first if she was alone, but half the time she was chasing after Daemonar who had never knocked once in his life. "Come in," she called, settling herself in a chair as the door opened. She would have rather been standing; sitting while the other person stood seemed so…pretentious. But she had to admit to herself that she knew when her legs were being overworked.

Jastian entered and bowed. "Good afternoon, Lady," she said formally. She stood and Karla got a good look at her. Jastian had changed into black leather pants and a green silk shirt with a leather vest, hair pulled up into a tight chignon. Her wide belt was empty, but Karla suspected Jastian had plenty of knives waiting to be called in and attached to that belt in a matter of seconds.

Karla was about to tell her to sit when she caught Jastian's psychic scent. "Hell's fire, you're a Black Widow!"

Jastian didn't move, but she was suddenly wary. "Is that a problem?"

Karla's mouth curved up. "It means you're _interesting_." She waved Jastian over to the couch next to her. "What's with cutting your nails?"

Jastian hesitated. "Being a Black Widow in Terreille is a dangerous thing. I guess I'm still waiting for an attack here."

Karla snorted. "Not in Dhemlan. In the larger towns Black Widows have stores that they sell illusions from."

"And in Glacia?"

Karla shrugged. "It's getting better. Did Lucivar tell you about my uncle and the problems he created?" Jastian nodded. "Well, the percentage of Black Widows in Glacia is lower than in the rest of the Blood in Kaeleer. So there aren't as many as like in Dharo or Dea al Mon. After the taint was cleaned out of the Blood, the worst of the people spreading rumors and trying to make the Hourglass's Craft illegal were gone. But it's slowly getting better."

Karla gave Jastian a curious look. "Marian said that Eyrien women aren't taught to use weapons, but you haven't been here that long to get as good as you are."

Jastian gave her a small smile. "A Red-Jeweled Black Widow either learns weapons or gets broken in Terreille. There's very little middle-ground."

Karla raised a fair eyebrow at her. "So you're good at dispatching males?"

Jastian leaned forward a bit. "When I was still an adolescent, I was attacked by two young men wanting to rape a witch for sport. They were aristo Hayllians which meant they answered to nobody as long as their victims were lower class or from another Territory. They were expecting me to cower and beg. I cut them into pieces. After that, killing bothersome males was easy."

Karla's smile bloomed into a full wicked grin. "I think I like you."

Jastian laughed and leaned back. "Are you really going to lay into Lucivar for creating a personal guard for you?"

Karla frowned. "No," she grumped. "I'll just end up in the fountain and still get the guard anyways."

Jastian held the laughter in for as long as she could, which was roughly three seconds. Karla started laughing as well, and in that moment they took their first tentative steps towards friendship.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Dear Trista,

I was very happy to get your last letter. Please give my congratulations to your sister. I know you were thrilled to be able to be there when your niece was born. She is going to grow up in a world far different from what we knew. And if she is like us, I hope that she will be able to openly take pride in her skills, and not be feared or taunted. On that note, my thanks for the updates about our other coven members. I am so glad to know they are beginning to thrive. And yes, I have heard from Salanne and Cara. I have it on good authority that the Queens they are serving are good women who will help them acclimate to their new homes.

It's hard to believe I've been in Kaeleer for three months. In some ways my life in the Secret Coven seems almost like a dream. It's hard to imagine that we survived so well for so long when this life was sitting here all along on the other side of a Gate. There is so much I would like to show you here, so many amazing discoveries about the Blood and Protocol, and wonders like seeing the dragons of the Fyreborn Islands. I'm not trying to rehash old arguments or open old wounds. Merely saying that in time, I hope you can come to visit and see Kaeleer for what it is. I still find myself stunned from time to time. I have recently taken horse-back riding lessons as my Queen likes to ride. My teacher is the horse I've been riding. Dealing with the kindred is a challenge, but one I've enjoyed.

It is also strange to openly be a Black Widow. I know that in some parts of Terreille, they are starting to accept Black Widows, but here they have always been part of society. They are not expecting to gather on the edge of towns, weaving webs in secret. Last week I went to the town of Halaway, and for the first time I wore my Hourglass pendant openly. The proprietor of the store I went to was surprised to see it, and for a moment I thought he was going to ask me to leave. Instead, he began to apologize, and opened a locked door near the stairs. It held supplies that one would need for practicing the Hourglass's Craft. The shopkeeper was still apologizing for not knowing I was a Sister of the Hourglass and if I needed any special items, he could order them. I was so relieved at being accepted; I ended up purchasing a new frame cover that I didn't really need.

But now things are changing. I wanted to let you know that this will be my last letter from SaDiablo Hall. That seems terribly melodramatic, doesn't it? What I mean to say is that after three long months of training, Lucivar has deemed us ready to become the personal guard of Lady Karla. Our contracts will be officially transferred to her this afternoon and we will leave for Glacia in the morning. Although I think I will miss living at the Hall, I am looking forward to moving on to the next phase of life here.

I've spent some time with Lady Karla, and I've found her to be an amazing young woman. She spent a great deal of her youth hearing how "Ladies" should behave - sound familiar? - And fighting back so that she could be Karla and not a puppet. And yet the struggle has not made her a hard, uncaring person, but one who can empathize with being different. She's not thrilled with having a personal guard, but she says that since she will have an _interesting_ female around, maybe it won't be so bad, and much better than males constantly around her.

Well, it is almost time for me to leave. I do hope this message finds you well. My love to everyone.

Jastian

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Jastian cast a quick spell to dry the ink on the letter and then folded the paper and put it in the waiting envelope. She dripped a bit of wax onto the back and stamped it to seal the paper inside. She glanced around the room. It was as clean and neat as she had found it when she had arrived three months ago. Her clothing and personal affects had been packed and servants had taken them to Glacia that morning. Now the room she had called home seemed more like an inn. Neat, well-decorated, but no real personality.

There was a light knock on the door. Jastian picked up the letter and opened the door. Holt, a footman serving the Hall, smiled at her. "The Lady said you had a letter," he said.

"It's going to Terreille," she said, handing him the envelope.

He touched the brim of his cap. "Yes, Lady. I'll get it to the message post today."

Jastian stepped back into her room, wondering what to do for the next hour until it was time to go. That letter had been looming over her, needing to be written, but she wasn't sure what to say without sounding condemning or angry or even sad. Jastian went to the window, staring out over the now-familiar view. Yes, she was going to miss the Hall, but was ready to take the next step in her life. Her webs of vision had confirmed this, although there were some parts that were still confusing. She just wished that it had been that obvious to others. But then maybe it wasn't as much what was obvious, but how you were willing to live your life. Maybe that was the hard part.

A single knock on the door jolted Jastian out of her thoughts. The door opened and Karla walked in. "Kiss, kiss," she said and glanced around.

"I was going to help you pack," she said with a gleam in her eye as she plopped into a chair.

Jastian smiled, knowing that Karla was teasing. "I was just so eager to babysit your skinny butt that I've been packed for days."

Karla laughed and called in a flask and a couple of glasses. She poured a clear liquid that smelled like something that would strip paint out of the flask and into the glasses. Jastian sat down on the chair next to her and took one of the glasses.

"Am I going to be able to walk after this?" Jastian asked. The last time she'd accepted something from Karla, she'd enjoyed every drop of the rich golden liquid. And then found herself being dragged to bed from where she'd passed out in the hallway.

Karla grinned and took a swig. "Sure. It's just Khary's homebrew this time. Not recommended for children, pets, or anyone wearing less than the Green."

Jastian took a sip and fought to keep her face from imploding as the liquid stripped the skin from her tongue and throat. It burned all the way to her stomach where it settled down, and produced a nice hot glow that radiated out through her limbs. Not bad. Not bad at all.

"Good," she wheezed. Karla couldn't hold back the laughter. Jastian tried to glare, but ended up smiling instead.

Karla's eyes flicked over Jastian. "Is that the babysitter costume?" she asked.

Jastian glanced at herself. "What's wrong with it?" She actually liked the new uniforms. It was a light gray tunic and trousers with Karla's crest over the left breast. The black leather belt was the double-buckled style of an Eyrien warrior and would hold knives, and other gear easily. The new black leather boots were butter soft, but the soles were thick and comfortable so standing for hours in them were a breeze. Jastian's hair was pulled up and back into its usual tight bun to keep it out of her way.

"It looks like a uniform," Karla complained.

"How shocking," Jastian replied dryly.

"You'll stand out."

"That's the point," Jastian said. "See, we stand out in the crowd. When someone wants to hurt you, they'll see one of us. Then they think twice and run off."

Karla tossed back the rest of the liquor in her glass and refilled. "I'd rather they come out and get their asses kicked." Since being attacked and the Purge, Karla had cleaned out her court's circles. She had allowed too many people in to placate those that had supported her Uncle Hobert. Of course many of those people were gone or broken since the Purge, but enough had remained. She had moved some of them to less prominent positions where they didn't have as much access to her, and made sure the others knew that one whiff of treason would be enough to get whole families executed. She _hated_ running a Territory knowing there were so many afraid of her. She would prefer they love her, but she wasn't going to ever let her Territory come under attack again, especially an attack from the inside.

Karla sighed, knowing she wasn't going to win the uniform argument for one reason. Lucivar had decided on the uniforms. If any other male had decided on the uniforms, Karla would be howling from the rooftops. Lucivar would let her howl, then toss her in the nearest body of water and hand out the uniforms anyway. And after the last three months of training the guard members, she had no doubt they would wear the uniforms every day, no matter what her objections were in Glacia.

"I cleared some room in my workroom," she said.

Jastian was getting used to abrupt topic changes when dealing with Karla. It would shock a lot of people to know Karla had a bigger brain than mouth and sometimes that brain worked faster than the words would come out. "Oh?" Jastian finally said.

Karla smiled. "It's for you. So you don't have to just stand there when I'm weaving a tangled web."

Jastian smiled, blinking suddenly at the prick of tears that suddenly burned her eyes. After so much time in the Secret Coven, she had missed weaving with other Black Widows. In Kaeleer, it was something done in private. Not out of shame, but so the witch could concentrate on her work. Jastian had told Karla about weaving with her Sisters and the small gesture of making room so they could work together gave Jastian a rush of warmth for the young Queen.

"It won't bother you?" Jastian asked.

Karla looked at her. "You don't sing off-key when you weave, do you?"

Jastian grinned. "I save my singing voice for when there's a prisoner that needs to be tortured." Unfortunately, Karla had chosen that moment to take another drink, and promptly snorted the fiery liquid up her nose when she tried to laugh and swallow at the same time.

She started choking, trying not to spew the mouthful of liquid as she coughed and laughed all at once. Jastian leaped up and over to Karla, whacking her on the back a few time. After a few minutes of coughing and sputtering, Karla finally got herself under control. Jastian was still kneeling by Karla's seat.

"Are you okay now?" Jastian asked.

Karla looked down at her, still dealing with the giggles. Her face was flushed a light pink and her eyes were sparkling with laughter. She really is pretty, Jastian thought. Males might be put off with her short spiky hair, but it suited Karla. Made her look…unique. And Karla certainly was a unique woman.

"Don't worry," Karla wheezed. "You don't have to tell Lucivar your first act as a guard was to kill your Queen with laughter." Jastian could only grin back.

There was a perfunctory knock on the door and Lucivar strode in. He looked at the two women. Both of them looked back with laughter sparkling in their eyes. He thought about asking, and then decided that he really, really didn't want to know. He'd learned long ago not to ask any of the coven to explain anything. A male ended up slamming his head against the nearest wall trying to understand their explanations.

"Are you two ready?" he asked.

Jastian stood and helped Karla up. They both gave Lucivar a wicked grin, and spoke at the same time.

"Kiss, kiss."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Months passed and the seasons changed. Karla's new guard had come to Glacia at the beginning of spring. By the end of spring they were a constant presence around Karla that nobody really noticed anymore. As summer came, it was obvious that Karla would rather have Jastian with her than any of the males. At least, there was a whole lot less yelling when Jastian was on duty than one of the males. Since Jastian was the only one without family in Kaeleer, she didn't mind the extra guard duty. By summer's end, Jastian was Karla's primary guard with the males there only when Jastian couldn't be.

Karla had found herself going from being saddled with an unwanted guard to having a close friend living with her. She hadn't had that since Morton died. Jastian was a quiet presence in the background when Karla was doing her Queen's work, but then would break out from being a guard and would sit down and chat with her during regular times. Karla hadn't realized how lonely she'd been in Glacia since Morton's death, and it was wonderful to have someone at home that wasn't so intimidated by the Queen that they forgot she was a real person too.

Jaenelle's First Circle wasn't intimidated by her, even the ones that wore lighter Jewels, but sometimes she Karla found it hard to relate to them. She loved them all, but only Jaenelle had grown up outside of Kaeleer. None of the other girls knew what it was like to have to put a shield around your bed every night because one of your uncle's friends might decide to "tuck you in". The girls were getting married and having babies. None of them received sidelong glances and dealt with whispers about how "unnatural" Karla was to not have a Consort, or even a lover for that matter.

Jastian was over 1,000 years old and had spent it all in Terreille. She knew what it was like to fear the males around you, even the ones that were supposed to be your friends. She had dealt with bitches that would turn on you in a second. As a Black Widow, she had not only been called unnatural, but been outlawed as well. She understood very well what Karla was dealing with in Glacia, and had listened a lot and been able to give her own perspective. It made Karla feel like she wasn't alone in the world and that alone made things a little easier to deal with.

And Karla thought that maybe she could take some credit for the positive changes that she had seen in Jastian over the last few months. Jastian had relaxed a little having males around her. At first she had refused to be alone with more than one male at a time without Lucivar or Daemon there, and now she would enjoy a glass of brandy with her guard team before bed. Karla had noticed how carefully Jastian had watched her interaction with males. It had been weird, but then Karla realized that Jastian was learning from her how to properly interact with males. Jastian had never had anyone teach her real Protocol, just that self-serving junk the Queens in Terreille forced down everyone's throat. So Karla, bad-tempered and irascible Karla, actually calmed a bit so that she could show by example how males and females interacted in Kaeleer. Karla had also discretely pointed out the Protocol books in the library and been pleased when she heard Jastian had borrowed them

And Jastian had helped stopped some of the whispers. Oh, Karla knew about those that thought she wasn't the "right" kind of Queen Glacia needed. They wanted someone more...feminine. Someone delicate. Someone that could be bent to the will of a handsome and ambitious male. Within the first three months of being in Glacia, Jastian had made sure every person in Karla's court, all of the circles, had seen the guard team "working out" in the practice circle. They'd seen the guard team teaching other guards. They'd seen Jastian take down a male twice her size, without using her Jewels. And they got the message. Nobody would forcibly remove Karla from her position as Queen of Glacia. Not while her personal guard still breathed.

In Glacia, summer was coming to an end and soon autumn would be upon them. Glacia was a colder Territory, so the people took the time to enjoy those days when the weather was just starting to turn. The temperature was already starting to come down and they could enjoy another week or two of gentle warmth before it was time to start pulling out coats and gloves from storage.

Karla left her bedroom that morning and was surprised to see Prince Jarrod, one of her male guards, standing in her sitting room. She counted the days. It wasn't Jastian's moontime. "Where's Jastian?" she asked.

"Lady Jastian scheduled a personal day," Jarrod replied.

"Oh." Karla said, curious as to what Jastian was doing. Normally, Jastian told her what she was planning when she had a day off. She liked to read and take long flights. She worked out a lot and had fallen in love with Karla's indoor swimming pool. I wonder if she's finally taken a lover, Karla thought. But who? Jastian had been asked to dinner by several males and she'd politely but firmly refused them all. Maybe one of the people she wrote to? She did get several letters a month, but they were all from Terreille. Karla found herself oddly irritated at the thought of Jastian having a lover. Not that she wanted Jastian lonely, no, she knew personally how difficult that was, but that Jastian had never mentioned wanting one or finding a male she liked.

There was an excited knock on the door. Jerrod answered it and Karla could see the change in her guard as he listened to the footman. She came closer to hear what was being said.

"But she's not due for two weeks!" Jerrod half-yelled.

The footman chuckled. As a man with four grown children of his own, he could take amusement in the panic of a first-time father. "They come when they're ready," he said. He touched his cap. "Good luck to you, Prince." He gave a nod and left.

Jerrod shot Karla a desperate look. "My wife..." he stammered. "She's pregnant and went into labor..."

"Is a Healer there?" Karla asked.

He nodded. "That's who sent the message. I need to..."

Karla understood his dilemma, caught between conflicting duties to Queen and family. One of her guard was sick with a contagious intestinal flu and two others were with her Steward visiting several cities in Glacia, making plans for Karla's autumn travels around the Territory.

"Don't worry," she said. "Go to your wife. I'll ask Jastian if she minds taking tomorrow off instead. Vontar and Leer will be back in the morning."

"Thank you, Lady," he said, and then on a spear thread let Lord Kemmerick know and get formal permission from him before leaving. Karla was the Queen and ruled the Territory, but only a fool would leave a guard position without asking the Master of the Guard first.

After Jerrod left, Karla sauntered to Jastian's rooms. The other guards had homes in town, and had a common sleeping room here at the Queen's mansion, but Jastian had accepted Karla's offer to live in there full-time so she had been given a small suite. She knocked, waited for a few seconds, and then touched the doorknob to go in when she didn't get a response. The doorknob turned cold in Karla's hand, and she felt the tangled web woven into the door awaken. Red power flicked over her, tasting and then accepting as it pooled back into the doorknob like a curling serpent.

Karla's heart was pounding as the door opened on its own. She could have deflected the death spell with her Gray Jewel, but what about the maids? A grimmer thought went through her head. Why did Jastian feel the need to have a spell like that on her door to begin with? If some male was harassing her...

Karla heard the shower cut off in the bathroom and Jastian poked her head out, swathed in a towel around her hair and another around her body. "Lady?" she asked, seeing Karla's dark expression.

"Has anyone bothered you?" Karla asked too softly, and Jastian knew she was talking to the Queen.

"No, Lady," Jastian replied formally. Well, as formally as she could in towels.

"Why the spell on the door?"

"It's a freeze spell," Jastian replied. "And it's only active when I'm bathing. The person trying to enter without permission would be paralyzed until I released them from the spell."

"But why here?"

Jastian gave her an odd look. "Because when I'm sleeping there's a shield around my room. But when I'm bathing, I'm even more vulnerable because I have to allow people to come in like the maids or a footman. I spun into the web those who can enter without harm. Anyone else would be frozen where they were until I found out why they were coming in."

Karla looked exasperated. "But why do you need one here? Has someone said something to put you on guard?"

Jastian gave her a sad little smile. "No, Lady," she replied. "Maybe one day I'll be able to relax without the extra security webs. But not right now." She looked away, unwilling to keep meeting Karla's ice-blue gaze. She cleared her throat. "Did you need me for something?"

"Well..." now Karla felt like a bitch for asking a favor after she upset Jastian. "Jerrod's wife went into labor and I was wondering what you were doing today...and...Oh, never mind."

Jastian's smile became a real one. Karla wasn't the best at an apology. Her favorite way to apologize was to stop poking at the problem. "I was just going into town today to do some shopping," she said. "If you need to come into town, I can put on my uniform and be ready in just a few minutes."

"No, it's okay," Karla said shaking her head. "You've got things to do and if you're in uniform, you're going to be a guard and not just you."

Jastian stood there for a second, conflicting desires tearing at her. On one hand, she really needed to go into town. On the other, she wasn't going to leave her Queen alone and undefended. An idea sparked in her mind.

"Karla," she said, "would you like to go into town with me...do some shopping, maybe lunch?"

Karla perked up. The only time she ever got to just shop was when she was with Jaenelle, and shopping with Jaenelle was...an experience. "No being a guard, just hanging out?" Karla said hopefully.

"Sure," Jastian said with a shrug. "Not something we should do every time, but why not?"

Karla grinned. "I'll see you downstairs in half an hour," she said as she walked out the door. "Kiss, kiss." She could hear Jastian laugh as she went back to her room and got ready to go out in town. She sent a psychic communication to her butler to have a coach and driver ready and then changed clothes. Her closet used to be full of Morton's old clothes, but since becoming Queen she had finally been able to wear what she wanted. She still refused to wear a dress, but she finally had some nice casual clothes for when she wanted to be comfortable but presentable as well.

Karla headed downstairs and drew up short when she saw the back of a strange woman talking to her butler. For a moment she was angry that a stranger had been admitted without the butler letting her know, but then she saw the woman's wings. The woman turned slightly and Karla's jaw fell open. It was Jastian…but a very, very different Jastian than Karla was used to.

It dawned on Karla right then that she'd never seen Jastian with her hair down. She had done something with it so that it was pulled back on the sides, but fell down to the bottom of her shoulder blades in a thick mass of fluffed silk. She was wearing a white silk blouse the cut tight right at her ribs and green, crushed velvet pants hung on her hips, tied with a white braided belt whose tail hung down to mid-thigh. The white was crisp against her tanned skin, the outfit leaving a tantalizing stripe of her slender mid-section bare and emphasizing her feminine curves. Her brown leather boots were stylish, but looked comfortable enough to walk in over distance. Jastian had even added some color to her face, putting a line of kohl around her eyes and some lipstick.

Karla felt like the dowdy country cousin compared to Jastian. How in the name of Hell did a woman who was so tough turn around and look so…so…much like a girl. A gorgeous one at that.

Jastian smiled at Karla. "Ready?"

"Sure…" Karla said, closing her mouth before she made a bigger ass out of herself. "So, where to?" she asked as they got into the coach.

"I need to do some shopping for myself," Jastian said. "A friend of mine in Terreille is having a baby and I wanted to get a gift to send to her." She sat back and thought for a minute. "I don't suppose you could recommend a good bookstore?" she asked with a smile.

"Bookstores, I'm good at," Karla said, sending a location to the driver on a psychic thread. She settled into her seat and a smiled bloomed. This would be a real day out shopping and having fun. It had been ages since she'd done anything like that. So what if she was the daisy to Jastian's rose. At least they were both going to have some fun.


	7. Chapter 7

Hello, all, sorry about the delay getting the chapter out. Life kept intervening on me, and then I didn't like what I had written and had to do a bunch of rewrites. Then Shalador's Lady came out, and I didn't so much as read it as I inhaled the book. Which I'm very glad I did because it's got some Karla in it and that actually helped me with this chapter. And if I may say so, if you haven't read the book, IT IS WONDERFUL!! I won't give away any spoilers, but seriously folks, if you haven't read it, then hit the bookstore or library and get it.

Switching topics, yes, I know the last chapter had a lot of exposition in it, but I had to pick the lesser of two evils. See, I needed time to go by, and it was either some exposition paragraphs so that we could get to the real meat of the story, or put in a couple of filler chapters. And since I have bad habits about filler chapters getting long and wandering off, I reined it all in and went with the exposition. We won't be having too much of that from now on since in my opinion, this chapter is where the real story starts.

So, thanks again to all those who have reviewed. I absolutely love hearing from you! And no, I don't get mad over constructive criticism, because I think what I've gotten in the past has helped make me a better writer. All right, enough talking because I'm going to post this on and then get back to re-reading Shalador's Lady.

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Chapter 7

The morning and early afternoon had been spent in a mercantile whirlwind. Not like Jaenelle's form of shopping where if you like something, you buy two of every kind of it, but going to stores, browsing leisurely and making purchases of every kind. Jastian hadn't been kidding when she said she needed to shop for herself. They kept an easy pace so that Karla, while still using her cane, didn't have to stop as much.

After the bookstore, they had gone to a larger store that stocked mostly items for the home. At first Karla wondered if Jastian had decided to move out on her own – or with a lover – but instead Jastian only bought a few things for her suite. She got a new blanket for her bed, not that she didn't like the linens that were there she had assured Karla, but she just liked the blanket and its matching pillows. There were some other decorations purchased and Karla realized Jastian was buying the little personal items that made her rooms hers and not borrowed. At that store, she'd also found a baby layette and decided to get that for her friend.

They'd then gone to a clothing shop where Jastian immediately went to the lingerie section. She hadn't come to Kaeleer with much to begin with and what she had was about ready for the rubbish bin. Karla was vaguely embarrassed as they wandered through the underwear and watched as Jastian made her selections. Karla had always worn underwear that was heavy and covered as much as possible, both to look less attractive and to add another layer of armor between her and someone trying to grope at her. Watching Jastian at ease with the silk and lace reminded Karla that nobody could hurt her like that anymore, and maybe it was time that she got things that she would want against her skin.

Later they spent some time in the clothes. After some pleading and cajoling, Karla had finally given in and tried on an outfit that Jastian said would be perfect. She had tried it on and then stared at the image in the mirror. The deep red silk pants were loose and comfortable but very complementary to her pale skin. The matching red and orange top was a skimpy halter top, but it had a built in bra that actually gave Karla some cleavage. It was comfortable, feminine, covered the scars on her legs, and wouldn't get in the way if she had to call in a war blade and kick some ass. Karla had to admit, she liked Jastian's style although she complained out loud about how girly the outfit was even as she bought it.

Finally they had settled into a dining house for lunch. The proprietor had been very solicitous to his Queen and had no problem giving them a booth that offered plenty of privacy. They placed their orders and then relaxed into the rather comfortable seats, a glass of chilled wine taking the edge off of the afternoon's warmth.

"This has been the most relaxing day I've had in forever," Karla said. Going shopping with Jaenelle was fun, but never, ever relaxing. She hadn't really gone out with Jaenelle since the poisoning. Jaenelle tried to pace things, but Karla always felt like she was just slowing the group.

Jastian smiled. "I'm glad." She ran her fingers through her hair, letting the long black strands slide over her shoulders. "I don't remember the last time I went shopping just for fun."

Karla's forehead creased. "I thought you had errands?"

"I did. And then you came and it became fun."

Karla blushed for no discernable reason. "So," she said, trying to think of a topic while pretending like her cheeks weren't dark pink, "How did you find the Secret Coven? I mean, must have been hard to find real Black Widows."

"My grandmother was a natural Black Widow," Jastian said. She completed her training, but was broken. She still was able to marry and had my mother. The talent skipped a generation, and there I was, on a cusp of womanhood, and starting to show the signs of being a Black Widow. My family couldn't pretend I wasn't anymore. So my father started to do what he could to protect me by training me with weapons. Mother asked Grandmother if I could stay with her once I…"

Jastian blew out a breath. After hundreds of years, this part was still hard. "Mother assumed I was going to be broken and started to plan accordingly. One day Grandmother came to the eyrie and announced that a Black Widow needed to be with her Sisters. She took me to a small group of women that practiced in secret. After I had to leave Askavi, they helped me get in touch with the Secret Coven. By then I had made my Offering and the women appreciated having a dark-Jeweled witch who was trained in combat techniques."

Karla looked sympathetic. "You know, I thought I had it rough here. It must have been awful living in hiding for centuries."

Jastian smiled a bit. "It wasn't all bad," she said. "We had to be careful yes, but sometimes we would live for years in a proper home, just a group of unmarried women that lived together for protection. It wasn't that uncommon in Terreille. We still laughed, still found joy in the world. There were wonderful moments I wouldn't trade for anything and times best forgotten. I had wonderful friends and lovers and terrible enemies. I suppose it's like that for any person."

Karla perked up and Jastian knew from that look she was in trouble. "Lovers? You've never mentioned having lovers before."

Jastian laughed. "I'm over a thousand years old. Of course I've had lovers."

"Marian was 1,200 years old when she met Lucivar and she hadn't ever had a real lover before." Karla tilted her head. "I know you've refused half the males at my home. Do you only like Eyriens?"

Jastian felt heat swirling up in her face and stared into her wine as if something utterly fascinating had appeared in the glass. "No," she said. "I've had lovers from several different races."

"Just because you're on my guard doesn't mean you can't have a man in your life," Karla said.

The heat in Jastian's face was becoming an inferno. "There's nobody my type," Jastian finally said, hoping it would placate Karla. She took a glance at Karla's face and sighed. Nope. Karla had that look of bullheaded determination that declared she wasn't going to let a topic go.

"What do you mean not your type?" she asked. "I admit we've got a lot of pale blondes here, but there are males from all over Kaeleer that serve me. She hesitated, eyes narrowing. "You're not attracted to _married_ men, are you?"

"No!" Jastian said quickly. She took a deep breath. "I don't like men at all in that way," she finally said. "I prefer a woman in my bed."

Karla's eyes became perfectly round. Jastian glanced away, wondering how soon her dismissal would come. It wouldn't be the first time someone had turned away in disgust because of her sexual preferences. Incredibly, Karla began to giggle.

"Really?" she asked. "But how?"

Jastian felt a thread of anger run through her. "I don't think it's much different than anyone," she said. "Two people meet, there's chemistry, sometimes even love."

"No," Karla said with a wicked grin. "I mean _how_? I get Rainer and his lover can manage, but well, women aren't exactly _equipped_."

Jastian's jaw landed somewhere on the table as Karla leaned forward expectantly, her face showing she was dying of curiosity. Thank all the Darkness the serving girl chose that moment to approach. She gave the Ladies a small smile and then served them the food they had ordered. She refilled their wine and water and left them again with a smile.

Karla took two bites of her food and then stared at Jastian for several long minutes. "So," she demanded. "How does it…work?"

Jastian put her fork down. "I have no intentions of giving you the mechanics of my love life," she said with measured dignity. "Suffice it to say, two women can be together and, I have it on good authority, its better with a woman than a man."

Karla was willing to bet none of her friends would say that about their Consorts and husbands. As she started to eat, she wondered if there were some books Uncle Saetan could recommend on the subject. She wondered what kind of seizure he would have when she asked, and that was such a wonderfully deliciously thought that she knew she would have to get to the Keep as soon as possible. She supposed two women would still kiss, still touch each other. It made her think about her Virgin Night which led to more questions.

"What about your Virgin Night?" Karla asked. "Did you just…endure? Lucivar got me through mine by catching me up in a fantasy about flying. But he wears the Ebon-gray. Not many men in Terreille could do that for you."

Jastian's smile turned wistful. "My Virgin Night wasn't awful. I was with a very kind, very gentle woman whom I had fallen wildly in love with."

Karla wanted to know how _that_ had worked, but Jastian had already made it clear she wasn't answering any technical questions. Well, if Uncle Saetan wouldn't, maybe Rainer would. Jastian put down her fork and leaned forward, the movement breaking Karla from her thoughts.

"This really doesn't bother you?" she asked hesitantly.

"Hell's fire, why would it?" Karla said. "I understand not wanting a man in my bed." She snorted. "I just never thought about…women like that, I guess." Jastian looked relieved and Karla immediately understood. Fury ripped through her. "Who acted the bitch when she found out you like women?"

Jastian knew she was no longer dealing with Karla, but a predatory Queen on the verge of real anger. "It's not that," she said, trying to sound soothing, but her own emotions were a little too raw for soothing. "Yes, in some places, it was seen as unnatural, but a Black Widow was considered unnatural from birth on. That didn't bother me. What hurt was when someone would whisper she loved me in the dark, and then hide and deny the relationship in front of others."

"Who?" Karla snarled.

"A Queen," Jastian said. "A Queen who knew she would never be able to rule, never be able to make things better if the people knew she would rather have a woman as a lover."

Karla paused. In some ways, she wanted to go to Terreille and rip the bitch's face off that had hurt Jastian. In another way, she understood self-sacrifice in order to do right by the place she ruled. Still, Karla knew she would never lead a person on like that, knowing how much it was going to hurt the other person when she denied the relationship.

"Karla," Jastian said, leaning forward, "none of it matters."

"Of course it does!"

"Not from where I'm sitting," Jastian replied as she leaned back and gestured around them. "I asked her to come with me to Kaeleer. She refused. The result of it all is that I'm now in Kaeleer, having lunch with a dear friend and serving a wonderful Queen. I have a job that I like, a good place to live, and I can be a dark-Jeweled Black Widow without worrying about being executed if anyone found out."

She took a sip of her wine and contemplated a moment. "I've heard the phrase 'everything has a price' many times since I came to Kaeleer. The price of my life now was losing the life I had. She hurt me very badly, I can't deny it, but that was the final straw that made me come to Kaeleer. Considering what I've gained since then, it was worth the pain."

Karla looked almost chastened. Well, as close as to chastened as Karla could look. Jastian reminded herself that Karla really was much younger than she looked. The poisoning she had suffered had left deep scars and made her seem much older than she really was. She'd never been in love or even taken a lover. Her Virgin Night had been something to get through, not a treasured memory. Then Karla looked up at Jastian and there was pure wickedness in her eyes.

"I could always ask Lucivar to be the "ambassador" between Glacia and wherever she rules."

When the serving girl came up to check on her customers, she politely left without asking why the Queen of Glacia and her friend were howling with laughter.

Later that evening, Karla had groaned as she lowered herself into a tub of herbed hot water. She still exercised as much as possible, and with Jastian as a sparring partner, she thought her legs might be getting a little stronger than before, but a day out like this still ended with painful, tight muscles all through her legs. She used her cane and did her best to keep her body strong, but the Healer in her knew that one day the damage to the muscles would be too much and she would lose her ability to walk. It was a bitter pill to swallow.

But the bitch that had poisoned her never walked again either.

The hot water and herbs were doing their job and Karla began to relax as the pain eased. She probably should have told Jastian that she needed to go home after lunch, but they had been having such a fun day. Karla couldn't remember the last time she had gone out without being constantly fussed over. Although Karla did notice that the Coach rides got longer. They had gone to a book store after lunch, and then to the leather shop halfway across town so Jastian could get a specialized belt she had ordered. Then they had gone to a shoe store which was only a couple of blocks down the road from the book store they had just gone to. Karla didn't say anything, but she recognized the signs of fussing when she saw them. Although she had to admit, Jastian's method of fussing was a lot better than most males. A Warlord Prince would have decided for Karla that she was tired and they were going home. An explosion would have followed. Jastian simply made sure there was a lot more resting in between shops, and mysteriously, all of the places they went to had some kind of seating.

And Karla couldn't help but wonder if Jastian knew how to fuss over a Queen because she was also a female, or because she had fussed over lovers like that. Taking a woman as a lover. She knew men sometimes preferred their own sex from Rainier, but she'd never met a woman that preferred women. What a...interesting notion. And she still had every intention of writing Uncle Saetan in the morning and getting some answers. Her eyes sparkled with wicked cheer as she imagined him reading the letter.

Jastian's revelation had made Karla think about her own Virgin Night. Lucivar had been very gentle and kind when they got started, but it was only the Night of Fire brew that had made her feel anything close to desire. She didn't like the way his body felt against her, didn't like feeling trapped under all that maleness. She had been seconds from begging him to stop when he had asked her to let him past her first barriers and then took her on the wildest flight of her life. But Jastian had said hers was wonderful. Karla couldn't help but wonder if hers would have been different if someone like Jastian had been there. Soft skin, long silky hair running over her body, full lips to kiss. A strange little shiver ran through Karla.

After a while the water began to cool and Karla reluctantly got out of the bath. She had let her butler know that she would be dining alone in her room that evening, not wanting anyone to see how tired she really was from her outing. Besides, a chill rain had begun to fall and the thought of curling up in front of a warm fire with one of her new books sounded like the perfect way to end the night. She went into her bedroom to put on her pajamas when she noticed the tissue-paper wrapped bundle on her bed.

Karla went tense with alert. She quickly descended to the Gray, a shield wrapping around her without thought. She sent out a probe tendril to the package and sensed nothing dangerous. Strengthening the personal shield, she put another shield around the entire bed and used Craft to push the tissue paper aside. As the paper lifted back, something lavender was revealed. Karla recognized the object and gasped. Who...how...?

It was a gorgeous lavender nightgown that she had admired at the lingerie shop. Heavy silk that was delightful to touch, edged with cream lace. There had been prettier nightgowns there, but they had been all lace and elastics that barely covered anything at all. Gowns meant to be worn by a woman for a man's arousal and pleasure. This nightgown was knee-length, meant to be soft and airy and comfortable for a woman to relax by herself in. It certainly wasn't Karla's usual sleepwear of flannel shirt and pants pajamas.

There was a note underneath the nightgown. Karla dropped the shield from around the bed and picked it up. Karla, she read, even ass-kicking witches deserve something nice in private, Jastian. Karla blushed scarlet, realizing that Jastian had noticed her fingering the gorgeous lavender silk and turning away. For someone who wasn't guarding me, Karla thought, she certainly was paying a lot of attention to what I was doing.

Karla dropped the shield and towel around her and pulled the nightgown over her head. It whispered down her body in a cool caress. It was soft as it had looked in the store, the lavender color very complementary to her blue eyes and pale skin. Karla put on a robe, and couldn't help but take a delight in the silk secretly touching her under the soft but shaggy robe.

In her sitting room, a table and chair was by the fire. A bowl of rich beef stew was on the table with a small loaf of bread and crock of whipped butter. The cook had also sent up a slice of her famous chocolate fudge cake, and Karla seriously considered skipping the stew and enjoying the cake for dinner. But she curled into the chair, picking up her new book, and began to read the latest Tracker and Shadow novel as she ate the stew, comforted by the warm food going in, and the feel of silk all around her.


	8. Chapter 8

AN: Hello! Cat is back from the scary land of cyber-darkness. Actually, Cat's job is easing up a bit for a couple of weeks and this is a good thing. Sorry for the delay in getting this written, but things have been nuts in the annoying reality that some fools call "real life". Actually, I had a chapter written, but as I looked at it, I realized that I hated the whole freaking thing. Hated what happened, where it took the story and how freaking cliché it was. So I started over. To make up for it, the next chapter is ten pages and one character does something that has been the funniest mental image I've gotten from anything I've ever written. I think you guys will approve when you read it

Again, thanks for your patience, and taking the time to do reviews. I won't be shy. I love reviews. Love seeing them in my inbox. When having a rough day, I reread them to get reminded that there are good things. What can I say, I'm a junkie. But I really appreciate my junk, so all is well. All right, no more babbling, we got story to get to!

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Four days later Karla was in her office with her Steward, working out the plans for her autumn travels around the Territory. Jastian was at her normal post in the corner of the room where she seemed to be distant and ignoring everything around her. Anyone with guard training would have been able to tell she was positioned so that she could see every entrance and exit and would be able to get in front of the Queen in a heartbeat if needed. It had been a quiet day, mostly dealing with paperwork and planning, so when the door to Karla's study flew open, everyone leapt about a foot in the air.

Lucivar Yaslana was standing in the doorway, his dark wings stretched to make him look even bigger and imposing than he really was. Which wasn't really needed. The man was damned scary-looking as he was. Lucivar's wings flicked down as he stormed into the room. Jastian took a step towards him, knowing that there wasn't any stopping the Ebon-gray, and walked smack into an Ebon-gray shield. Lucivar shot her a glance that ordered her to stay where she was and not to make trouble. Karla's Steward, who wore the Opal, had enough sense to already get out of the way. Besides, he had seen the Dark Court's First Circle first hand. Karla was likely to get soaking wet when tangling with Lucivar, but never harmed.

Lucivar slammed his hands on the desk hard enough to crack the wood. "What did you do?" he snarled.

"Kiss kiss," Karla said in a tone that translated her greeting into something closer to 'and your horse too". "I was planning my autumnal tour of the Territory."

Lucivar leaned towards her even more menacingly. "I've seen my father in a lot of situations," he said. "Seen him at the peak of happiness, and so enraged that he fell into the Twisted Kingdom. But I have never, NEVER, seen him read something that made him choke so hard on his yarbarah that it squirted out of his nose!"

Karla made a funny noise that was either clearing her throat or trying desperately to hold in a peal of laughter. "I simply asked him for some research material," she said, looking up at him with wounded innocence.

Lucivar knew that look. The last time he'd seen it just like that, Karla had told him that of _course_ she knew how to make a simple casserole and wouldn't he _just leave them alone_! That was roughly an hour before the Hall's kitchen had been blown to smithereens by Karla and Jaenelle over a "simple little error that could have happened to anyone". He pointed a finger at her.

"The High Lord wants to see you at the Keep, now."

Karla knew that protesting would mean being slung over his shoulder and ending up at the Keep soaking wet. And that wasn't how she wanted to be when the High Lord started questioning her over the letter. Which really should not have been that big of deal. Should it?

Karla rolled her eyes. "You didn't need to be so dramatic," she said calmly. "If Uncle Saetan wants me, then of course I'll go to the Keep right away. Are you going to be my escort?"

"Lady, I'll be more than happy to take you to the Keep," Jastian said, tapping on the shield.

"No," growled Lucivar. "I'm taking her." Jastian felt the timing spell slide into the shield and knew it wouldn't be released until they were well on their way to the Keep. She wanted to scream and pound against the shield, but knew that she'd have to badly drain the Red in order to make a dent in the shield, and might not be able to ride the Winds. She might have done it anyway but Karla called in her cane, stood, and then gave Jastian a small wink. It suddenly hit Jastian that Karla was going to be alone with a furious Eyrien Warlord Prince that outranked her, _and she wasn't worried a bit_.

Karla really wasn't worried about Lucivar as he drove the small coach through the Winds towards the Keep. Lucivar was a lot of yelling and dunking in fountains, but he would never hurt her. Neither would the High Lord hurt her, but she was very worried about what he might say. Karla straightened up a bit. Well, it didn't matter. Sure, he was the unofficial Steward of a Court that didn't officially exist anymore, but _she_ was an official Territory Queen, the absolute law within her boundaries. She would not allow anyone to bully her into dismissing Jastian because of her preferences. Uncle Saetan had shown himself to be a tolerant man when dealing with Rainier, so he was going to have to extend that tolerance to Jastian as well.

When they reached the Keep, Lucivar escorted Karla quickly to the study that the High Lord had made into his own private chamber where the man himself was waiting for them. He smiled as they came in and Lucivar immediately propelled Karla into the chair next to the desk. "All right" Lucivar growled. "Now talk!"

"Lucivar," the High Lord said quietly. "Draca has set up a place for you outside."

Lucivar turned and looked at his father for a long minute. Then his shoulders slumped. "Mulch or wood?"

"I believe there's an axe and barrel," Saetan said. "Your choice."

Lucivar left the room quickly, leaving Karla alone with Saetan, who was giving her a very thorough looking-over. It was easier to stand up to Lucivar than to not squirm when the High Lord gave that long and piercing stare. "New clothes?" he finally asked. Karla glanced down. She was wearing the outfit Jastian had picked out with the addition of a black jacket with the same red and orange design on it.

"Yes," she said.

"Not your normal wardrobe," he said.

You mean it makes me look slightly feminine and not an amorphous blob like the rest of my clothes, Karla thought. "I went shopping with Jastian," she said. "She got me to try it on and I liked the way it looked."

Saetan had to hide the small smile that wanted to erupt at her bristling tone. He wondered if Karla understood what the significance of her dressing better was, and if he should tell her if she didn't "It does look very nice on you," he finally said. That seemed to calm her down just a bit.

"I guess you didn't have me come up here to discuss new clothes," she said quietly. Saetan sat down in the chair behind his desk, a quiet symbol of speaking from authority, father to daughter, rather than a discussion between equals.

"No," he said, calling in a letter. Karla almost wilted when she noticed that it was covered in a fine dark-red spatter. "I was...well...I was a bit taken aback when I got your request," he finally said. "Am I right to assume Lady Jastian is the reason for your request?"

Her ice-blue eyes flashed fire at him. For a man who was supposedly retired from the living Realms, he certainly had a good idea of what was going on. He didn't say, but Karla suspected he'd received a full report about Jastian from Jaenelle and Daemon. "She's a good person, no matter who warms her bed," Karla snapped. "Jastian's been a loyal guard and a good friend as well."

"I never thought otherwise," Saetan replied calmly. His demeanor and calming tones helped to fade a lot of the anger out of Karla. When she had written the letter, she had thought Saetan would be a little shocked, but honestly, after dealing with the First Circle since they were children, the man must have heard _everything_ by now, but he'd send her a book or two with the information she wanted. When Lucivar had hauled her to the Keep, it was the first time that she had worried that Saetan wouldn't want Jastian anywhere near her.

"I am, however, curious as to why you asked for this particular information," he said.

Karla shrugged. "Jastian told me that she prefers women, but wouldn't say how two women would...well, anyway, I wanted to know. She was too embarrassed, I think, so I figured there had to be a book or two in the library that would give some detail." Color suffused through her cheeks.

Saetan opened his hand and called in three books. "There were a few books covering that particular topic," he said, handing her the books. "I thought those three to be a good start, and if you're interested, I'll pull some more for you." He leaned forward, putting his elbows on the desk and steepling his fingers. "But my darling, you still hasn't explained why you were curious."

"Well, Jastian wouldn't tell me," she said defensively.

"I understand that," he said. "But most people aren't interested in the sexual techniques of those who work for them."

That got Karla's attention. She sucked in a small breath. "I have no intention of embarrassing her," Karla said quietly. "If I had demanded that she tell me, she would have. I thought asking for a book would be a better choice."

"Keep in mind where she's from," Saetan said. "It wasn't long ago that a twisted Queen might force someone like Jastian to perform in front of the entire court." Karla paled. "If Jastian does ask why you wanted to know, she's not going to like hearing 'because you wouldn't tell me'." He gave her a piercing look. "You need to know for yourself why you asked so that you can at least give her the truth."

Karla squirmed. Curiosity was the only reason, right? It was such a strange idea, women together, that she wanted to know more. She could hear the High Lord's voice in her mind. Why do you want to know more, his voice asked. What do you really want from it? She wasn't sure what he meant, but it was important to him, so she needed to think on it carefully. She straightened in her chair.

"Thank you for your advice, High Lord," Karla said formally. "There were things I didn't realize, and others that I need to consider more."

It was Uncle Saetan that smiled back at her. "Good. Think about it. And next time, a little warning before asking something that...unusual. Warm yarbarah is pleasant. Warm yarbarah through the nose, not so much."

Karla's laughter rang out in the room. She vanished the books and grinned. "So, think Lucivar will still get me dinner?"

Saetan rose and glanced out the window. "I think you're another half a barrel from dinner. And in the meanwhile, I'm going to take some rest before Draca calls us to eat." Karla gave him a wicked smile that made Saetan very glad that he was leaving and his son could deal with this witch for the rest of the day.

Karla waited until he closed the door before settling herself onto the couch, calling in one of the books Saetan had given her, and began to read.

*~*~*~*~*

Jastian wasn't sure what to do with the unexpected day off. Neither the Steward or Master of the Guard seemed worried about Lucivar hauling Karla out of there, and seemed to take it as a matter of course. Lord Kemmerick had told her flat out that if anything happened to Karla, it was because they had gotten through Prince Yaslana. And the only two men who could get through Yaslana were the High Lord and Daemon Sadi, and if either of them had turned on Glacia, then the Darkness have mercy because they were all going to die.

Jastian had gone flying for a while, thinking about what they said. A Warlord Prince had, in effect, kidnapped a Territory Queen, and nobody was worried about it. Their opinion was that she was now his responsibility to care for. Maybe if it was another man, they would be worried, but nobody doubted the integrity of Lucivar. As a matter of fact, the Steward's only concern was to warn the housekeeper since Karla would probably come back dripping wet. It took Jastian a long time of flying for the truth to begin sinking in how different Kaeleer was, and how she had been assuming Kaeleer would keep with Terreille's prejudices.

Well, there was only one way to find out for sure.

She banked to the left and headed back into town. The cool, crisp air washed past her skin and through her hair, her mouth parting slightly so she could taste the air, letting it move through her as she moved through it. She could pick up the psychic scents and feels of the people below her, most of which weren't used to seeing an Eyrien flying, but she caught no fear, no anger, and it was wondrous to fly over a proper city where the inhabitants didn't stink of fear and degradation.

She landed on the front patio of the eating house that she and Karla had enjoyed during their outing. Jastian had gone there alone once since then, they made _the_ best pie within a hundred miles, and got the same serving girl as the time she and Karla had been. This time the girl had introduced herself and Lyria, and although her actions couldn't be called flirting, they were a definite invitation for flirting. Jastian knew she wasn't ready for any kind of relationship, even if physically...well, the mind and body didn't always agree on what was best, but she wanted to know how Lyria would respond back to flirting.

She walked in and Lyria looked up at the door, a delighted smile on her face. Jastian glanced around. It was early, but there were already a couple of customers at the bar, and a man and woman at a table. Lyria came up to her quickly.

"Lady," she said with a warm smile. "Welcome. Is Lady Karla with you?"

"It's Jastian, please," she said, pleased to see a slight blush in Lyria's cheeks, "and no, I'm alone today and thought I would stop in and see if you still have that wonderful lemon pie."

"Of course," Lyria said. "Our customers would riot if we didn't."

"Is the garden still available for customers?" Jastian asked. The dining house had a small garden with a few tables outside. With the weather turning cold, places with outside dining were closing those areas off, so there was a much better chance of privacy out there.

"It is available, if you don't mind the crisp temperature," Lyria said.

Jastian grinned. "I'm Eyrien," she said as Lyria began to lead her through the restaurant towards the garden door. "We love to fly through crisp air."

Lyria's eyes raked over Jastian's lean form, taking in the leather pants and skimpy top under her cloak. The top tied around the waist and neck in the back, leaving Jastian's wings fully unencumbered. "And I bet you know how to warm up later." She turned and opened the door, taking Jastian to a table in a tucked-away corner, giving all the privacy Jastian could get at a public place.

"Hot coffee with your pie?" Lyria asked.

"Please," Jastian answered and Lyria left to get the food. Jastian leaned back, using a warming spell to take away the worst of the cold weather and warm the chair under her and the one across from her. It wasn't long before Lyria returned with a generous slice of pie and carafe of coffee. She glanced behind her and called in a plate with two nutcakes on it.

"Specialty of the house," she said in a low voice. "The cook only makes these when she's got a big aristo party coming in. I snitched a couple for you."

Two nutcakes on top of pie. Jastian smiled. That was a blatant request. "Are you busy?" she asked. "I don't think I could finish off two, and I wouldn't mind some company."

"Well, if you don't mind," Lyria said. "They are my favorite, and my only table besides you just left." She slid into the seat, her eyes flashing with appreciation on feeling it warmed beneath her. She was a Yellow Jeweled witch and using power for little courtesies would drain her quickly, so she appreciated the small gestures by the darker Blood.

Lyria took a nutcake and began to delicately nibble on it. "How do you like working for Lady Karla?" she asked. Jastian felt a thread of concern and wanted to demand why she was interested in Karla, but held back. The girl probably rarely talked with anyone in the Queen's household, and would naturally be curious as to what the Queen was really like.

"She's wonderful," Jastian replied. "I immigrated from Terreille and Queens there...well, until the Purge, almost all of the Queens would have seen a Red-Jeweled Black Widow as something that must be broken and killed. Karla is someone you can be honored to serve."

"I guess you're pretty busy," Lyria said. "I haven't seen or you much around town, and trust me, the Eyrien Lady _is_ noticed when she goes out." There was a sparkle in Lyria's eyes that made Jastian smile.

"I am busy usually," she said. "But I happen to be off-duty tonight. Know anything about the nightlife in town?"

Lyria leaned forward, nutcake forgotten about. "My shift ends at nine. If you want, we could meet up and I could show you some of the fun places to go. They're not aristo establishments, but my friends and I have fun there."

Jastian gave her a grin that bordered on predatory. "I'm not aristo. I'd rather have a good time than a proper time any day of the week."

"Then I'll see you at nine?"

"You better believe it."

*~*~*~*~*

By the time Karla came home, it was late. Jaenelle, Daemon and Marian had come up to the Keep and Karla enjoyed a pleasant dinner with them and chatting for a while later before Lucivar decided it was time to get Karla home. Daemonar was spending time with his little friend Orian, and Marian needed to pick up the boy and assess whatever damages he'd done. Lucivar had already resigned himself to going over to Endar and Dorian's eyrie the next morning to personally apologize and pay for all damages incurred. Maybe if they were very lucky, it wouldn't be too bad. Orian was a Queen. A small one, but a Queen was still a Queen, and Daemonar's young Warlord Prince instincts were starting to kick in. Hopefully he would follow her lead rather than pulling her along for one of his "adventures". Karla had found that amusing and wondered if any Queen would be strong enough to slip a leash on Daemonar.

Karla had checked in with her staff when she returned to make sure nothing had happened that required her attention. Her Steward told her that they could finish planning her autumnal tour in the morning, and there was some paperwork that perhaps she could look at if she wasn't too tired. Her Master of the Guard said that everything was fine, however, Lady Jastian was out for the evening, and wasn't expected back until late. Would she mind if Lord Jerrod was assigned as her personal guard in the morning?

That had caught Karla by surprise. Jastian had gone out? Where? With who? Karla told Lord Kemmerick that Jarred was fine for the morning and went to her suite with the paperwork her Steward had given her. She could have used her Gray Jewels to track Jastian's Red - the only Red in Glacia - but decided to give Jastian her privacy. She'd barely left Karla's side in the months that she'd been in Glacia, and hadn't socialized with anyone outside of the Hall before that. It was a good thing then that she felt comfortable enough to spend an evening out. Even if curiosity was killing the Queen she served.

Karla settled herself on the couch in her sitting room and put the paperwork on the table in front of her. She then called in the book she'd started reading earlier, promising herself just one or two more chapters and then she would get to work. The book was actually a love story with a witch who was a carpenter falling in love with a Black Widow who owned a small farm that she had inherited from her parents when they died unexpectedly. The Black Widow had hired the carpenter to make some repairs to the farm, and as the story went on, they'd become attracted to each other. There'd been a rather spicy love scene that had Karla's mouth gaping open the whole time. She couldn't help but wonder if Jastian had done the same things, and if this was a realistic depiction of two women falling in love. In any case, the story itself was quite good, and the subject material was well, very, _very_ interesting.

A few chapters, a signed document granting a land claim, and then a dozen more chapters, and Karla finally had to admit she needed to go to sleep. The story had become very intense, but she'd read the last page three times and still didn't know what was going on since her eyes kept trying to close. She vanished the book and straightened up the papers, promising herself she'd get up early and read through them in the morning.

She got off the couch and went to her bedroom, deciding to wear the silk nightgown Jastian had given her. She had to admit that she liked the way the silk felt against her skin and although it was "girly" it wasn't like anyone else would see her in it. As she slipped the gown over her head, a rippling feeling caught her attention. Karla's head jerked up sharply, her senses sharp as she identified the sensation. The locks. Someone was trying to penetrate the locks on the front door.

Karla's former Master of the Guard, a Warlord Prince, had retired a few months after Witch went to war with Terreille due to injuries he'd sustained in the fighting. He had trained Galen to take his place. Galen was only a Warlord, but he wore the Green, the darkest Jewel of any male in Glacia. Every night he put Green locks on the doors when the household had retired. Karla called in a robe and slipped out of her room, cloaked in Gray sight and protective shields. She glided to the stairway so that she could see the main entrance. It could be kids playing around. That had happened before. But if someone did come in they would be getting a blast of Gray power as she called for the alarm.

The locks rippled again, and then Jastian passed through the door. Karla's muscles locked painfully as she forced back the power she had come within a breath of using. Her hand dropped and she let down the shields. And then watched in amazement as Jastian's normal feline grace had turned into stumbling and wobbling as she made her way across the entrance hall to the stairs.

"Jastian?" Karla called. "Are you okay?" Jastian jumped at the sound of a voice, knocking into a small table. She caught the vase that wobbled dangerously near the edge of the table and pushed it clumsily back on.

"Shhhhhh," Jastian said, pointing at the vase. "You...you gotta be...gotta be quiet." She took a step back from the table, tripped over a piece of lint on the floor, and landed flat on her ass.

Karla used Craft to float quickly down the steps just as Jastian was pulling herself back to her feet. One whiff and Karla's nose wrinkled. "How much have you had to drink?" she asked. The darker Jewel someone wore, the more it took them to get drunk. And Jastian was full-out blitzed.

"Just enough," Jastian said. "And then a few more." She giggled at the joke and Karla sighed. At least she was a happy drunk.

"Let's get you to bed," Karla said.

Jastian made a little grumbling noise. "But I wanna...wanna..." she took another stumbling step. "Wanna go to bed."

Karla put Jastian's arm around her neck to give her some balance and then used Craft to float them up the steps. "Where did you go to get in this state?" she asked when they got to the top of the steps. Karla was still keeping Jastian's arm around her, using Craft to take the weight as she tried to maneuver the other woman towards her room.

"Oh Karla, you should have come," Jastian said. "We had soooooo much fun. Lyria met me with her friends and they're all nice and you'd like them cause you're real like them too and we danced and danced and had a few drinks and danced and then...then..."

She stopped suddenly and grabbed Karla by the shoulders so that they were face to face. Karla's breath caught at the dismay in Jastian's expression. "Did you know there are people who have no idea what it's like to fly?" Jastian demanded.

Karla smiled a little and got Jastian moving again. "Not everyone has wings," she said.

"I know," Jastian moaned. "And that's sad. So I showed Lyria and then her friends wanted to go, so I flew around and around and I think Meggie threw up a little." Jastian started giggling. "And Braedon thought he was soooo tough cause he's a Warlord Prince but I showed him a free fall and he was screaming like a little girl."

Karla had to bite back a laugh at the image of a terrified Warlord Prince plummeting to the ground with only a drunk Eyrien keeping them from splattering. And she wondered if anyone was going to complain about how puke got on their roofs. So she'd gone dancing, huh? Who would have guessed that Jastian liked to dance? They had made it to Jastian's room. Karla opened the door and dragged them both through.

"So, you made some friends?" Karla asked.

"Mmmm...lots of people," Jastian said, falling onto her bed. "Lyria's pretty."

Karla felt herself stiffen for no discernible reason. There was no reason for her to be surprised, or hurt, but for some reason, she was.

Jastian's eyes opened and focused on Karla. Her robe had come open, revealing the lavender gown beneath. Jastian gasped and sat up quickly. The room spun wildly and she grabbed at one of the three Karlas in the room, finally getting her hand on one of them. "You wore it," she breathed and smiled happily. "You didn't say if you liked it. I hoped you wouldn't be mad cause it's kinda a weird present, but you looked sad when you put it back and I wanted you to like it."

Karla smiled a little. "I liked it. I usually don't wear pretty girly things, but this is private and I thought you were very sweet for giving it to me."

Jastian swayed, almost pulling Karla onto her. She reached up and touched Karla's spiky blond hair. "You got pretty hair," she slurred. "Like icicles. But soft. And pretty." She ran her fingertips across the tips of the spikes and giggled. "And tickly. Pretty tickly icicles."

She giggled again, swaying a bit. Her hand slid down so that she was holding Karls's cheek in her palm. Jastian's body froze, locking into place. Her gold eyes met Karla's ice-blue ones, and they were no longer drunkenly dazed, but solid and farseeing.

"You're melting," Jastian said firmly. "The first drops are here. The ice will break and you must choose..." Her voice trailed off and the sudden surge of power faded. Jastian's eyes blurred, and she smiled again. "I think I want to go to sleep now," she said, leaning over so that she was on her side, her wings tucked in tight against her.

Karla could feel her heart beating in her throat and wanted to wake Jastian up and demand to know what she had meant. Had she meant her physical stamina? Please, Sweet Darkness, no, she thought. Not yet. There was still so much left she needed to do, and no Queen strong enough to take her place. She swallowed hard, trying to push past the lump that had formed. It could mean anything, she told herself. A drunken Black Widow wasn't the best at interpreting vision, especially without a web to help focus it.

Karla moved Jastian's legs so that she was completely on the bed and vanished her shoes, calling them in on the floor beside the bed. She thought about trying to get the blanket on top of Jastian and then grabbed the quilt at the bottom of the bed and flipped it over the sleeping woman. She had enough anti-freeze in her that she wouldn't get too cold tonight.

Karla called in her cane and limped to the door. She paused for a moment and looked back on Jastian, her face relaxed and peaceful and a blanket of silky black hair flowing over her shoulder and down her back. "Good night Jastian," she said softly.

A light snore was the only response.

Karla sighed, stepped through the door, and extinguished the witchlight.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Karla's autumn tour was popular with many of the towns and villages in Glacia. She usually arrived soon after the harvest so that her visit didn't interrupt the important gathering of food, and the Queen was able to enjoy post-harvest parties and gatherings with her subjects. She could inspect the villages personally, both Blood and landen, and ensure that her Territory was well-prepared for winter. Karla made sure that her entourage paid for itself and was not a burden on the people. This made shopkeepers and inns very pleased to see a whole retinue of new customers coming into town.

Jastian had been told that Karla loved her trip around the Territory and it was a lot of fun to travel with her. There were parties and feasts and a sense of lightheartedness that made every day feel like a celebration day. But this trip was different. Karla seemed distracted and moody and far more inclined to snap than smile. And Jastian was beginning to think the problem wasn't the harvest or errors in the tithes, but something she had done to upset Karla. Jastian would have apologized, but she had run into the little problem that she had no idea what she should apologize for.

After the second town, Jastian finally decided to ask Karla directly what the problem was, and not take "nothing" for an answer. Jastian knew women were moody, but she knew what moody was like and this wasn't a passing thing. They were staying at a fairly large inn, the town being on a major trade route had a lot of travelers, and Karla was in the upstairs suite that was reserved for important travelers and high aristos. Jastian waited until after dinner when the Queen would be able to have some privacy and went to her room.

Jastian knocked on the door, feeling strange. A month ago, she had become comfortable with a quick psychic communication and walking into Karla's room. Now there was this weird formality that had sprung up.

"Come in," Karla said. Jastian took a deep breath, opened the door and walked in.

Karla was sitting at a desk, looking over some paperwork. "Yes?" she asked, sounding neutral.

Jastian sat down in the chair in front of the desk. "What's wrong?" she asked directly.

Karla raised an eyebrow. "Nothing," she said quietly. "I'm just very busy."

"Karla," Jastian said. "You're not talking to a male. I'm female. I know what nothing means. So if I've done something, just spit it out so I'll know if I need to apologize or yell."

"I'm not angry at you," Karla said.

Jastian snorted. "Yeah, and the sun is shining bright in Hell today."

"I'm fine," Karla insisted.

"Really?" Jastian drawled. "Then why has the guard rotation changed? I can tell you're not comfortable being surrounded by males. The only thing I can think of is that you're mad at me and don't want me around as much."

"The guard rotation was set up the way it was because the men had families and you didn't have anyone in Kaeleer," Karla replied. She looked at Jastian directly for the first time and was confused by the puzzled look on Jastian's face. She sighed, trying to keep her temper in check. "You should get to spend time with your new...friend."

Jastian leaned forward, a tiny disbelieving smile touching her lips. "Do you think Lyria and I are lovers?" she asked.

"It's none of my business," Karla said quickly. She looked down, absently moving papers. "You have every right to spend you personal time as you see fit."

"Good," Jastian said. "Because I'd rather spend it with you." Karla looked up so sharply that she jerked back in her chair. Jastian smothered a little laugh. "I admit going out with Lyria and Braedon and rest of them is fun every now and then, but...well, they're young and immature."

Karla snorted. "You probably think anyone under a thousand is young and immature."

Jastian shrugged. "The truth of the matter is that I do this every century or so. I'll spend time with someone like Lyria who is young and confused as to what she wants, and it reminds me of myself hundreds of years ago. And then I get reminded that I don't want to regress back to that person. I like being a confident, mature woman that knows what she wants, not a confused girl that's following along with what her boyfriend wants."

Karla's eyes narrowed. "She's being forced by a male?" The temperature in the room dropped and frost formed around Karla's water glass.

"No, not forced," Jastian said quickly. "The truth is that Lyria is conflicted by her desires. She's curious and wants to know what things would be like. She's in a relationship with Braedon and well, he's not the only male that would like to have two women together. I would say he's encouraging, but not forcing."

"So you want her but not him?" Karla asked.

"Actually, I want neither," Jastian replied. "Lyria's a lot of fun, but she's not someone I could have a real relationship with. And I grew out of casual encounters centuries ago." Jastian leaned back in her chair, wondering why her going out would have upset Karla. It didn't make sense. Then the answer hit her. Karla was lonely. Oh, she had lots of friends, but most of them were married and having babies and there wasn't the time for Karla as much anymore. Karla would never be comfortable being close friends with a male, and just when she was becoming close friends with a female, that woman suddenly starts taking off and running around with other people. Jastian felt ashamed of herself that she never thought about asking Karla to come, and had just assumed she wouldn't want to go to non-aristo establishments.

"I don't go to aristo places much," Jastian said, giving Karla a charming smile. "But if you wanted to go out dancing I'll try aristo places if you'll come to some of the places I've found."

Karla looked away. "I can't," she said in a small voice.

"Nobody is going to look down on you for going to a "regular" place," Jastian insisted. "It's the same as going to a harvest dance that everyone in town comes to."

"No," Karla said, mortified at feeling tears pricking at her eyes. "I appreciate the fact that you forget this," she said holding up her cane, "but I can't walk without it, much less dance."

Jastian made a rude noise. "You hauled a drunk Eyrien out of the entry hall, up the steps and to her room, but you can't dance?"

"I used Craft," Karla said dryly.

Jastian jumped to her feet, making Karla squeak when the desk in front of her and chair under her vanished. Karla felt the Red power pulling her to her feet, completely supporting her weight. A music crystal appeared on the fireplace mantle and began playing a waltz. Jastian took Karla's hand and pulled her into a waltz dance frame.

"I can't," Karla tried to protest. She had tried to dance before and it had been a disaster when her legs cramped and she'd almost fallen. After a few humiliating attempts, she'd given up.

Jastian shot her a wicked grin. "Shut up and dance," she said, and began to lead Karla in easy movements. Karla felt Jastian's Red power cradle her completely so that her entire weight was supported and all the pressure taken off of her legs. Why hadn't any of the males thought of that before, she wondered. But she already knew. If a male had tried to help her, she would have snapped and snarled until he backed off. But Jastian's use of power didn't feel like pity, but a way to get something Jastian wanted. And it felt really, really good to dance.

Jastian had thought Karla would be stiff and angry at her high-handedness. She knew she shouldn't manhandle the Queen, but she was Eyrien and the whole race was known for taking the direct route to solving a problem. She wasn't expecting it when Karla's ring finger flicked and the rest of the furniture vanished. Jastian gave Karla a bigger smile and began to move around the room, turning and rotating, swirling Karla out and then gathering her back in.

Karla had always loved to dance. She had refused Uncle Hobart's teachers, but when Rainier started teaching the coven and boyos, she had stopped worrying about some male using a dance as an excuse to grope her or try and twirl her into a secluded alcove. Dancing had become fun for the first time, and although Morton had been her usual partner, she eventually felt fine dancing with any of the males at SaDiablo Hall. When her legs had been damaged she'd been too grateful to be able to walk to complain about not being able to dance. But after three years of sitting on the sidelines and watching her friends on the dance floor, she had wanted to get up and dance even though the Healer in her knew it wouldn't be possible.

It was different dancing with Jastian. Not the steps, they were the same, but being held by a woman and feeling the differences between her and a man. Not referring to the obvious, of course, but more the feel of a softer curvier body pressed against her rather than the muscular men she had become used to dancing with. Her mind drifted to the book she'd borrowed and the one scene where the lovers were slow dancing and how they had used the dance to slowly strip each other. It was her favorite scene although a thousand torturers would never be able to rip that secret from her lips.

Jastian wondered why Karla kept glancing up at her, blushing, and then looking away again. Was she embarrassed over dancing with a woman? No, couldn't be. At SaDiablo Hall, the coven had danced with each other when there weren't enough males to go around. It was the way Karla glanced up and stared for a moment at Jastian's mouth before looking away again that made Jastian think a little differently.

_If this was anyone else, what would you think?_

_That I've seen this before. On women who are attracted but don't want to say it._

_Mmmhmmm._

_Karla's a Queen!_

_And? Wouldn't be the first one. Question is...what do you think of her?_

A flash of memory. A vision in a tangled web she'd woven before coming to Kaeleer.

_Standing in a cave of icy blue crystals. Snow falling outside. Warmth inside. She's holding something in her hands. She opens them. It's a block of ice with a heart frozen inside. Still. Cold. Blue. She closes her hands to warm the heart Opens them again. The ice has melted. Cradled in her hands, the heart warms to a healthy pink and begins beating strong and sure. She closes her hands again. Opens them. Inside is a shining..._

_No! No, no, a thousand times no! Not again! I'm not doing this to myself again!_

Karla felt the sudden tension in Jastian. A chair appeared in the middle of the room and as the song on the crystal faded, Jastian settled Karla into it. Karla could feel the Red power that had supported her pulling back. Her legs felt fine and Karla smiled a little, knowing that she would be able to dance again, even if she needed Craft to do it. Karla was thrilled with the discovery, but Jastian was suddenly looking pensive, almost distressed as she took a couple of steps away from the chair.

"And barely any power used," Jastian said. "With the Gray, you could dance all night and barely tap into your Jewels." She took another step back and gave a quick bow. "Well, it is late. I'll take my leave now."

She turned quickly and left the room. Karla tried to get up, but her desk was suddenly called in directly in front of her, effectively blocking her in for a moment. Karla sat, her brow creased with a frown as she took the minute needed to set the room right again. Had she done something? Karla knew she was well-skilled at upsetting people, but she usually did it intentionally. She honestly had no idea what she'd done to bother Jastian so much, especially when Jastian was trying to make _her_ not upset anymore.

Karla's head ached. It had been a long day and she still had another week on her tour. She enjoyed seeing the Territory and knowing that they were ready for winter, but this had been a long progression, and she was beginning to suspect it was because of Jastian. Not that she had done anything wrong, but Karla knew she was thinking about Jastian a lot lately. And in ways she probably shouldn't be. She had thought a lot about what Uncle Saetan had said about what other Queens would have forced on Jastian, and she wasn't about to make Jastian think that there were any strings attached to her service here.

But Karla still thought about things. And wondered…


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Karla had intended to talk to Jastian the night after their dance, but circumstances had prevented them from having the time alone to have a personal conversation. Karla had constantly been in attendance with the Queens that ruled the local towns and Districts as she traveled through Glacia, as well as townspeople and aristo representatives. There had been a few problems that she had needed to deal with, including one serious charge that a young Queen was letting her friends cause problems in the landen town without any reprisals. Too many of the Blood considered landens to be nothing more than pains in the ass, and unfortunately, Queens like this one made one make landens think the same of the Blood.

So Karla had spent several days taking care of that problem, speaking with the village representatives, the District Queen and finally the young Queen and her hooligan friends. When she had finished with the Queen and friends, they had walked out of the meeting pale and terrified, having seen a furious dark-Jeweled Queen for the first time, and all that fury aimed at them. They had gotten the point. The next time any of them abused any person in Glacia, they would pay a very, very high price. And the Queen knew that if Karla took her villages, there would be no chance of her ever ruling so much as the smallest, poorest village in all of Kaeleer.

It wasn't the first time that Karla had been required to discipline or correct a Queen in Jastian's presence, and normally she had been a stoic figure in the background, a silent reminder that no matter how angry the other person might get, this Queen was protected and would be kept safe, no matter the cost. But this time, Jastian wasn't a silent figure in the back. She seemed irritable, agitated over something. When one of the young men had slammed his hands on the chair's armrest and tried to jump to his feet to show his outrage, he was barely able to move before coming to a frozen stop, an Eyrien war blade pressed against his throat.

The moment had even shocked Karla. She knew Jastian had been a fighter before coming to Kaeleer and her skills had been refined by Lucivar, but damn, nobody had even seen the woman _move_. Karla would have felt Red power, but it hadn't been Craft but speed and temper. The boy had looked into Jastian's chilling gold eyes as she stood wordlessly with the blade against his neck and then he slowly lowered himself back into the chair. Jastian moved the blade but had stood by him for the rest of the meeting.

On the plus side, the troublemakers had stopped arguing, accepted their punishments, and meekly got the hell out of there as fast as they could.

And Jastian had returned to her post, cold and silent as before, but her psychic scent was bubbling with hostility.

Finally the mess with the Queen and her friends had been dealt with and Karla knew she would be able to get Jastian alone for a few minutes and find out what was wrong. Except Jastian wasn't on guard as scheduled. Karla went through the day visiting the village, talking with the people and celebrating the harvest with them as they got to see the Gray power that ruled the Territory. That evening Karla was finally able to corner Galen and ask if he knew what was bothering Jastian.

The Master of the Guard thought for a long moment. "The guard schedule had to change because of Jastian's moontime," he explained and then rubbed his chin. "But she has been…quietly riled the last few days. She got a letter from Terreille. Could be something in the letter but she gets letters from there pretty regularly." He hesitated and dared to add, "Could also just be a bit of pre-moontime moodiness." Karla glared at him. A witch could be moody anytime she chose. Just because bad moods also correlated with moontimes meant nothing. But it did give her an idea on how to approach Jastian.

Jastian had stayed in her room pretty much the whole first day of her moontime. She wanted to go for a flight and let the speed and air wash so many thoughts out of her mind, but then she would have had to deal with the males. If she were ensconced in her room, quietly reading and eating the meals and snacks they brought her, then they would leave her alone and not fuss and hover. The moment she tried to do anything physical, she had the entire guard yapping at her to rest, rest, rest.

She had decided to stay in for dinner. There was a banquet being held in honor of Karla's visit to the town, and Jastian really didn't feel like being around so many people when she was vulnerable. Oh, she could trust the guard to have her back, but still, a vulnerable witch was a broken or dead witch in Terreille. Some habits of self-preservation were hard to break.

There was a light knock on the door before it swung open. Jastian reigned in the instinctive response of letting a bolt of power fly for the second it took to recognize Karla.

"Kiss, kiss," Karla said, using Craft to drag a small table over to the chair that Jastian was curled up on. She called in a platter of food, servings from various dishes from the banquet that she knew Jastian liked. Jastian perked up seeing the rare roast beef and a pasta with a rich cream sauce. Fresh squash from the harvest sent up a warm herbed scent and Karla had even included a bowl of ice cream with chocolate syrup and a cookie with a neat little chill spell around the bowl that would keep the dessert from melting.

Best of all, a mug appeared in front of her. Karla was an amazing healer and her moontime brews were the first that Jastian had ever drank that not only tasted good, but got rid of all of the cramping and headaches and assorted misery that went with it. She picked up the mug, letting the warmth seep into her hands for a moment.

"Thank you," she said and took a sip. A rich warmth flowed down her throat, heralding the warm ball that would settle in her stomach and ease the pain.

"A Queen takes care of her people," Karla said lightly, but there was an undercurrent of seriousness.

Jastian caught the serious note, considered asking about it for a second, and instead picked up her fork and knife. She began eating the roast beef, savoring the juicy meat with an herbed crust. The food the males had brought her earlier had been tasty, but not what she'd been craving. Karla had brought her exactly what she had been wanting. Except for the ice cream. Jastian hadn't been craving ice cream until she had seen the bowl and then only politeness had kept her from eating the dessert first.

Karla watched quietly as Jastian took the first few bites of her food. Jastian closed her eyes, making a "mmmm" sound as she tucked into the beef. With Jastian's eyes closed, Karla couldn't help but stare at her. Her long black hair was down for once, something Karla had only seen a couple of times, looking like a curtain of black silk around her shoulders and down her back. She looked a little tired at the moment, but watching her mouth as she licked her fork Karla didn't care if Jastian looked a little tired. She looked…well…sexy was the only word that came to mind.

Karla looked away quickly. What was wrong with her? Okay, so Jastian was beautiful. Karla was friends with some of the most beautiful women in the Realm. But seeing them with their lips pursed had never made her want…want to…

For the first time in her life, Karla wanted to kiss someone.

Oh, she'd been kissed before. Lots of times. Most of them had ended with a knee planted squarely in the man's balls. And then would come the lecture from Uncle on why she should let some boy – or man – kiss and paw at her. According to him, it was the only way to overcome her "unnaturalness". She didn't want people to think she was unfit to rule, didn't she? Honestly, the only man who had ever kissed her and not made her want to vomit was Lucivar when he got her through her Virgin Night. And that was more the Night of Fire brew than real desire.

Karla glanced up and noticed that Jastian had opened her eyes although she was still intent on her food. Calm down, Karla ordered herself. It's time to return those books to Uncle Saetan and stop thinking about them. Thinking about what they had said and how…wonderful some of it sounded. Other parts well, Karla couldn't imagine doing them with someone. Well, yes, she had _imagined_, but not as in being willing to ask someone to accommodate her.

And that was the crux, wasn't it? Jastian was in service to her, and thus under her protection. Males understood that their service to the Queen could involve being requested in the bedroom, and if they didn't like it they simply could refrain from serving, or negotiate to have that duty removed, especially married men. Karla had no idea what the Protocol would be for asking a Lady to be with her. Maybe it was in some obscure Protocol book, but she wasn't about to write Uncle Saetan for another book. One tangle with Lucivar was bad enough. Next time, he would demand answers.

And Karla didn't even want to imagine that battle.

She sighed, drawing Jastian's attention.

"Have there been any issues with Lady Onya?" Jastian asked, referring to the errant Queen. She paused in her eating and looked up at Karla. "Or her so called friends?"

Karla smiled a little and shook her head. "After you made the one piss himself, the rest got the hint. It's not just the Warlord Princes in my First Circle that they need to worry about." Jastian's mouth turned up in a little self-satisfied smile and Karla decided this was as good of a time as any to broach the subject. It might piss Jastian off, but at least it was a way for Karla to distract herself from other thoughts.

"Are you doing okay?" Karla asked.

Jastian hoisted her mug. "I am now."

"No," Karla said. "I mean...something's been bothering you the last few days."

Jastian's smile faded. "It's nothing," she said too softly.

Karla raised an eyebrow. "Darling, I believe your exact words were 'I'm female, I know what nothing means' when *I* said nothing."

"I didn't say nothing was wrong, I said it's nothing," Jastian replied. "Completely different thing."

Karla decided that this was the kind of female logic that made Rainier prefer men to women. "Jastian, I hope you see me as your friend too. If you have a problem, I'm here to listen and help if I can. Did something happen in Terreille?"

Jastian put down her fork and sighed. "Nothing bad," she said and called in a letter. "Just a Winsol invitation." She opened it and looked at it with the same reservation and pain as if it was a death announcement.

"Do you not like Winsol?" Karla asked carefully, not wanting to open any old wounds.

"Oh, I love Winsol," Jastian said with a small smile. "It's my favorite time of the year. I should accept this invitation. I need to. I'm just not sure if I'm ready to." She glanced at Karla and looked away. "Remember when I told you about the Queen that I had been with before I came to Kaeleer?"

Karla's eyes narrowed. "Yes," she said, the air in the room chilling.

Jastian shrugged. "She's inviting the Secret Coven to celebrate together. It'll be the first time in a few years that I've seen some of them. I want to see them…" Her words were cut off as a rumble of thunder rolled through the room.

"Does the bitch know you want to see them or thinks you're crawling back to her?" Karla snarled.

Jastian blinked. She hadn't expected this level of fury from Karla. "I don't think she wants me anymore," she said calmly, more calmly than she actually felt. She just didn't want to chance igniting the Gray fury in front of her. "She has a Consort now, and we've been writing for months. I think she just wants the Coven together."

"You still love her." It was a flat statement.

Jastian shook her head slowly. "No, I don't," she replied. "I admit I was hurt when I came to Kaeleer, but I've healed. From her letters, she's happy where she is and I'm…well, I wouldn't trade what I've found here for anything." Her gold eyes met Karla's evenly. "This is where I belong. I know that. I'm just…Hell's Fire, I don't know."

Karla leaned back. "If you want to go and you don't think it's going to hurt you, then what's so upsetting?"

Jastian just looked at her for a long minute and let out a little laugh. "Sounds dumb when you put it that way." She poked at a carrot on her plate. The carrot offered no suggestions or arguments either way. She looked up. "You're right," she said almost defiantly. "I want to see my other Sisters. I don't want to be with Trista anymore, and the thought of her having a Consort stopped bothering me months ago. It's obviously not going to bother her to see me since she has a lover. Why should I lose the chance to see friends I haven't seen a while?"

Karla smiled, but her stomach churned. What if she didn't come back? "So I guess you're going to need some time off at Winsol?"

"A few days," Jastian said. She gave Karla a warm look. "I do want to spend some of the holiday at my new home."

"This year, on Winsol Night, when we dance for Witch, you can really dance with Witch."

Jastian's eyes lit up. "And that's something only a fool would miss."


	11. Chapter 11

I'm sorry for how long it's taken to post this chapter. Well, I posted it quick, writing was another matter. It's just been tough to write lately. On May 1st, a very close family member passed away unexpectedly. He had an illness that we were used to dealing with (ER then hospital stay once or twice a year) but this time things were worse and he died at only 30 years old. I've had a hard time dealing with it and although I've had Frozen Heart open many times on my computer, romantic writing just wasn't coming out.

Things are getting better though, and I'm feeling better about the whole situation. And I've found that my little muse has decided to stop thinking about death and get back on the subject of life. So I started writing again, and although I'm not entirely thrilled with the end of this chapter, I'm content with it. It got the story where I wanted it to be, and it doesn't outright suck, so I can be pleased.

And the next chapter won't take a month. Because I know what's going to happen and I can't wait to write it and find out what the characters are going to do.

Chapter 11

Karla's good mood evaporated the moment she walked through her door. It was the fourth day of Winsol, and she had been at a sleigh-riding party. It had been wonderfully fun to ride in horse and Craft powered sleighs across the snow covered fields, singing Winsol songs and laughing and squealing as the drivers would spontaneously race each other. They'd ended up back at the host's home where hot chocolate and treats were served to warm everyone back up. She and her escorts left the party in high spirits, but the moment she walked through the door, the tension was palpable.

Galen, her Master of the Guard, was waiting for her in the main hall. "What's wrong?" she asked. The psychic residue of rage and pain was like a blanket of dust all around.

He gave her a grim look. "Lady Jastian returned earlier." Karla frowned. The Territory Queens normally celebrated the first ten days of Winsol in their Territories and visited each other, and then the last three days were spent at SaDiablo Hall. Jastian had decided to go to Terreille and would return to escort Karla to the Hall. But she had come back six days earlier than planned.

"Did she say anything?" Karla asked.

Galen shook his head. "She was...quite upset." Now Karla understood the funeral pall over the residence. A Red Jeweled Black Widow in the depths of cold rage was no one to be trifled with. She could have destroyed most of the residence, including the people within, before Karla could have gotten here to stop her. Galen wore the Green, the darkest Jewel of any other male in the Territory, and his power combined with the rest of the guards would have barely slowed her.

"She went to her room," Galen continued, "and we heard her throwing things about. She left a few minutes later and flew away towards the mountains.

Karla silently went to a window with a mountain view. She quickly made the internal descent to the Gray, sending out psychic tendrils looking for a Red Jewel. She found it quickly. The Red was still now, locked into a bundle of pain and grief. And right near a Gray Wind.

Karla pulled back from the Gray, using a tether to keep her attached to the Red. She blew out a breath and looked at Galen. "I know where she is. I'm going to see her."

"I'll get a guard team right away," he said.

Karla shook her head. "No, I have to go alone. She won't talk in front of an audience."

Galen looked like someone had just admitted to stomping puppies to death for fun. "Lady! I cannot allow you to leave on your own! I..."

"I won't be alone," Karla said. "I'll have one of my personal guard with me in just a few minutes. Before he could protest further she caught the Gray Wind and followed it towards the Red. She knew Galen would be furious, but Jaenelle had taught her how to track someone using their Jewels, and it took a darker Jewel to find the person. This was the only way to keep Jastian in a place where she couldn't hurt anyone if she was still caught in the depths of cold rage, but still give her an outlet that she couldn't hurt.

Karla dropped out of the Wind, and immediately added an additional warming spell to her cloak. Mother Night, it was cold up here! She used Craft to air walk above the snow, heading towards the opening of a cave set in the face of the mountain. As she came close to the cave, she finally saw Jastian curled up in as small of a ball possible. Her knees were against her chest, arms wrapped around them and forehead against her knees. Her wings were wrapped around her body as much as possible, and Karla knew she was looking at someone who was slowly bleeding to death from an emotional wound.

"Jastian?" she called, automatically using Healing Craft to probe her gently and wrapping soothing spells around the other woman. No physical wounds although it was too cold for her clothing. She added a warming spell to the soothing spells before frostbite could set in.

"Go 'way," Jastian sniffed, pulling herself into an even tighter ball if that was possible. The Healer in Karla wanted to take care of Jastian. The Queen, and Black Widow, wanted to find the cause of her pain and rip it to shreds.

Karla knelt by Jastian, putting her hand on Jastian's wing. She could feel her jerking as Jastian sobbed quietly. "I'm not going anywhere," Karla said quietly, wrapping a soothing spell around her voice so that it would cling to Jastian.

Karla put her arms around Jastian as much as she could, stroking her hair, trying to calm Jastian while controlling her own growing rage. She took a few moments to send a psychic message to Galen to let him know that they were fine and didn't need assistance, and as a matter of fact, it would be best for males to stay away for a bit. She wasn't sure if Jastian's rage would be set off by a male, but it would be best not to take that risk.

Jastian didn't resist as Karla pulled her close and rocked her, stroking her hair and tried to offer as much comfort as she could. Karla was used to giving comfort and aid as a Healer, but this was so much harder. Oh, not the spell portion, she could do that without thinking, but pushing down her own fury at whomever had _dared_ to injure Jastian while still being calm and soothing was taking a considerable portion of her skill.

Eventually the soothing spells, boosted by Karla's Gray Jewel, were able to soak in and Jastian's tears slowed. The first indication that Jastian was even aware of her surroundings came when she un-tucked her left wing slightly and reached up to put her hand on Karla's forearm. She sniffed, called in a handkerchief and blew her nose and then rested a bit more heavily on Karla.

"Give me a name and a town," Karla said too quietly.

"No," Jastian said. "She's going to live in a hell of her own making. That's punishment enough." Jastian moved slight so that she could sit up. Her knees were still tucked up, but her wings flicked back so that she wasn't hiding anymore.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Karla asked, sensing that whatever happened, it was festering in Jastian, and she needed to get it out rather than let it keep churning inside. Jastian stared off into the distance for a long time. Karla strengthened the warming spells around them and waited. She wasn't exactly the most patient person, but being around Lucivar had taught her that pushing an Eyrien never worked. It was better for the Eyrien to decide that doing what the Queen wanted was what they actually wanted to do all along.

"When I got to Trista's town, it was...it was great," Jastian finally said. "She had been the leader of the Secret Coven, and for a Black Widow to rule anywhere in Terreille was an achievement, much less a small but thriving District. There's a good size Blood town and two landen villages. Several others from the Secret Coven were there and we all got to see the town and village and we were all proud of Trista. Glad she was doing something that would help the Realm."

Jastian paused and looked at Karla for the first time. "There's an unwritten rule that when you want to be friends with an ex-lover, you don't flaunt your current one. Trista had a court, and she had taken a Consort. And I thought, good for her. I wanted her to be happy. I'm happy in my life, she deserves it in hers. But she didn't just have a Consort with her. She _flaunted_ him constantly. Whenever it was the Ladies, she'd talk about his bedroom skills and how tireless he was and skilled and all sorts of details that nobody wanted to know. They'd be walking together, separately, or as escort, but the moment she'd see me, she would practically jump in his arms, giggling and whispering. Hell's fire, it was obvious the poor man had no idea what was going on."

Jastian let out a bitter little laugh. "This from a woman who had said many times that she would never let a male get close to her again. Never found one that was interested in her more than his own pleasure or position." She wiped her eyes for a second before continuing. "Not everyone in the coven knew that Trista and I were lovers. I wasn't ashamed, and I never thought Trista was, but it was just...private."

"The coven members that knew could see what Trista was doing and told me that Trista had been really upset that I left Terreille and was furious that she hadn't been enough to hold me there. The coven members that didn't know thought that she was just being a bitch because I was serving a very powerful Territory Queen in Kaeleer and not her, a District Queen in Terreille. They told me later that she had said I probably wouldn't come because I thought I was too good for them since I 'rubbed elbows' with the likes of Daemon Sadi and Lucivar Yaslana. Which is funny because in Terreille, most people knew they were powerful, but thought they were bastards of low-standing, not high-ranking wealthy aristos."

"I should have realized then..." Jastian said, her voice breaking. "Trista...she led the Secret Coven, not because she was a Queen, but because she was good at getting people to do what she wanted. And that was fine where we were because one person deciding to put off making a defense until morning could have gotten us all killed during the night. I should have guessed she'd do the same thing to me."

"She only wears Summer-Sky," Karla said, remembering what Jastian had said before about the coven leader. "How could she use a persuasion spell against the Red?"

Jastian gave her a wan smile that showed every century she'd lived. "It wasn't Jewel strength she used. Just the power of words and heart. She wanted the other coven members to think I'd become a pseudo-aristo snob and wouldn't want anything to do with their little lives. She wanted them to be cold to me so that I'd be confused and lonely and...vulnerable. That's why she hadn't invited the others that had moved to Kaeleer. I've kept in touch with them personally and they would have known better."

"One of the women had said she had believed Trista...until I got there and was so obviously happy to see them and still my old self so much that she couldn't believe that I was now a social-climbing bitch. So Trista used her Consort. I thought she wanted me to be jealous. Remind me of what I lost when I left her to immigrate. But then…" Her words trailed off as she stifled a sob. A part of her tears were from sorrow, but so much of it was anger. Anger at someone who once said she loved her and then trying to use her just like the purged Queens used any male for casual servicing.

Jastian's chin lifted defiantly. "Last night she came to my room. And we talked for a long time and I thought things were straightened out. That she was willing to accept that I was okay with the situation and we could move on. And then…and then she told me that she still wanted to be with me and she knew I still wanted her. She couldn't believe how clever I was becoming a personal guard to a Territory Queen in Kaeleer because now I had the credentials to be her personal bodyguard and nobody would think twice about it. She had it all worked out so that we'd have adjoining rooms and I could come to her at night. She even had it worked out with her Consort. He didn't care who she slept with as long as he was allowed a discreet mistress on the side."

"You were angry that she tried to seduce you?" Karla asked carefully. The only other person she knew who got this angry over a seduction attempt was Daemon. Jastian shot her a look of frustration and anger. Hot anger, Karla noted with relief.

"I'm private with my personal life," she said, "but privacy shouldn't be confused with shame. I'm not ashamed of who I am. I got over that hundreds of years ago. Trista is ashamed of what she wants. I could understand her taking a Consort. It's hard enough being a Black Widow in Terreille and she had said earlier, in private, that the people had a hard time accepting a Black Widow as their Queen. Any other 'unnatural' behavior and she'd lose everything. I understood that, felt sorry for her even. But not sorry enough that I'd live a complete lie, pretending to like men and then sneaking off at night and servicing the Queen!" Her voice had risen to a shout, and the words 'servicing the Queen' echoed across the mountains.

Now Karla understood. Jastian had admitted she'd once loved Trista. Now the stupid bitch was trying to take the real feelings Jastian had once had and turn them into something cheap and tawdry. She could imagine that bitch Queen thinking it was just part of her nighttime ritual, clean off makeup, brush teeth, get secretly pleasured, pick out clothes for tomorrow, go to sleep. And meanwhile it would be tearing Jastian apart. But what would the bitch care. She'd have her little District and the lover she wanted.

"What did you do?" Karla asked, wondering if there was carnage at a village she should respond to.

"I was honestly too shocked to say anything," Jastian said. "And she thought that meant yes. So she vanishes her clothes and has the _nerve_ to lie down on _my_ bed." Her voice was shaking, but with anger over tears.

"Is the bitch still living?" Karla snarled. Oh, she hoped not. Not when she could have a little chat with the High Lord of Hell and then that bitch would know what real pain was.

Jastian gave her a cold smile. "Oh, I gave her a few minutes and reminded her of everything she had done without since I had left and was craving." Her smile turned razor sharp. "Then I threw her naked ass out of my room." She stood and walked to the mouth of the cave, looking out in the distance. A piercing wind started to blow, pushing into the cave. Karla hadn't dressed for high mountain cold and she shivered despite the warming spell on her cloak and jacket. Without thinking, Jastian put a shield across the mouth of the cave and sent a warming spell through the walls of the cave.

That small, absent gesture touched Karla more than she could say. It was a gesture of someone who didn't think anymore about taking care of others, she just did it. Even wrapped up in her own pain, she had noticed Karla's discomfort and acted on it. It was that realization that got Karla on her own feet and she went to Jastian, putting a tentative hand on her shoulder.

"Not all Queens are like that," she said.

"Don't," Jastian said too softly, her voice ragged. "I'm sorry Karla, but I just can't."

"Can't what?" Karla asked, confusion coloring her tone.

Jastian whipped around sharply. "Don't you dare try and play that game with me," she hissed. "You know damn well where this dance has been leading. Anyone else and I'd…but you're a Queen and you'll always think of your Territory first. I accept it, admire it even. But I will not get my heart torn out again because of it."

Karla wanted to ask what game, what dance, but she knew instinctively that if she tried to deny anything, even for a moment, that Jastian would leave and although she might serve out her contract, it would always be the cool and formal relationship between a Queen and guard. She knew Jastian was hurting and she needed to show compassion and kindness. She intended to say something comforting. But the raw emotion on Jastian's face pulled out more that comforting words…it drew out truth.

"I'm not going to tear out your heart," Karla snarled. "You don't get to judge all Queens by what one bitch did to you."

"So you're going to step down?" Jastian shot back. "Risk Glacia to those who supported your uncle?"

"I don't have to," Karla said. "All this time and you really don't understand what it is to be a Territory Queen, do you? _I'm_ the final say in this land. _My_ will _is_ the law, and the people here bend to me, not the other way around."

"Oh, and how shall I bend oh mighty Queen?" The tone was sneering and brutally dismissive. But Karla could see the pain and hurt in Jastian's eyes and knew that Jastian thought she was doing the right thing for Karla.

Karla wanted to step back and tell Jastian about the emotional whirlpool she'd been in since they'd met. She wanted to explain the complicated thoughts and desires Jastian had risen in her. How some things were so new and scary and she had been afraid, but some things weren't and she was still trying to sort things out, which was harder when dealing with all the highs and lows.

Instead of talking, she grabbed Jastian by the shoulders and pulled her into a kiss.

Jastian froze for a moment when Karla first kissed her. For a bare second she thought about grabbing Karla and forcing her mouth open, turning the kiss into something violent and ugly that would drive Karla away, for her own good of course, forever. Oh, but her lips were so warm in the cool cave. And she was soft, her mouth, the skin of Karla's face under her hands. Jastian knew she should stop this, should push things back to the way they had been, but her tongue brushed Karla's lower lip and Karla opened to her so sweetly and naturally that Jastian knew she had lost the battle before it had begun.

Real heat and desire raced through Jastian, as strong and sharp as a blast from a Jewel hitting in her stomach. It had been so very long and Karla tasted so…oh, her taste and scent were more intoxicating than the finest wine, the strongest liquor, chasing away all better judgment and good sense. And then Karla's hands slid off her shoulders, stroking her back and wings, a subtle encouragement for Jastian to touch as well, an offer that Jastian eagerly accepted.

Sliding down to the floor…the last vestige of protest evaporating when they landed on a soft cushion of air rather than the dirty cave floor…knowing it was Karla that had made that cushion…oh, she tasted…felt…just…oh…


	12. Chapter 12

*Whistles causally, drops off chapter, tries to run out the door*

Oh, hiya guys. Sooo…what's with the pitchforks and torches?

It's not that whole "not updating for months" thing, isn't it? Oh, it is that whole "not updating for months" thing. Yeah…I thought it might be.

Sigh.

I'm sorry about that, guys. I didn't mean to leave the story hanging. A lot has been going on, and writing fell by the wayside. I had a serious health scare, and oddly this story became talismanic to me. I kept thinking that I'd have to be okay cause this story was hanging out there and I had to finish it. Stupid? Maybe. But when you're waiting for an anesthesiologist to make you go night-night while having your legs strapped at an awkward angle to an operating table, any comfort will do.

I did learn some things though. One, the doctor says that you'll feel a slight pinching pain, kick her in the face while you still can. Two, it is possible to pass out from pain. Used to think that was just a plot device. It's not. And three, the absolute most beautiful word in the English language is "negative". I don't know why it's got an unpleasant connotation. It's such a gorgeously liberating word. Especially when the final pathology reports are stamped with it.

All right, enough with the whining. Am I forgiven? puppy eyes What if I tell you the next chapter is half written? Or that there's three chapters written in the next story? And it stars Jaxin? (And yes, I've read the newest Black Jewels book, but I like my version of their future better, so I'm keeping Jaxin and Tersa) Okay, no more delays. Here's the next chapter, and I expect to have the next one finished within the week.

Thank you for your patience and for coming back to my little world.

Chapter 12

Karla sighed and stretched a little as her eyes slowly opened. A lazy smile drifted across her face. She was still laying on the cushion of air, Jastian's arm wrapped around her bare waist and her cloak spread over them. So _that_ was why all of her friends enjoyed their lovers so much. Well, damn, no wonder then. Every nerve ending in her body sizzled just remembering what Jastian had done. Karla was more surprised that her friends ever got out of bed if this was the same effect that they got from their lovers.

Jastian stirred, shifted, her arm tightening slightly. She leaned forward and kissed Karla's bare shoulder. "Morning," she muttered, running little kisses across Karla's back as she lay her head back down.

The first rays of morning sun were starting to creep in, Karla noticed. At some point last night she had let Galen know that she was fine, but it was getting late, and Jastian had plenty of camping supplies she kept with her. They would come home in the morning. Galen had nearly burst a blood vessel pleading with her to come back now, but Karla said she was fine and would contact him in the morning. She had to break the contact quickly because Jastian had just thought up something wonderfully inventive and Karla wanted to enjoy some new discoveries more than reassure her Master of the Guard.

And she didn't want to think about Galen as her skin goose-pimpled under Jastian's kisses. She shivered…oh, no WONDER that dumb bitch of a Queen had begged Jastian to be with her. If Karla had known Jastian could make her body do _that_ she would have dragged Jastian to the nearest empty room when they had met and had her way with her. And Karla was quite proud to have been a very fast learner. Jastian was a great teacher, and from some of the noises Karla had wrung out of her, Karla figured she must have been doing more than a few things right.

Karla laid back down, snuggling close to Jastian. "So what happens next?" she asked.

Jastian cocked an eyebrow. "Lady, you are insatiable," she said with a grin. "I'm not a machine!"

Karla laughed. "I mean..." she started, and some of the humor faded from her eyes. "I've never been in a relationship at all before," she finally said. "So where does this go from here?"

Jastian appreciated Karla's discretion and not rehashing how Trista had tossed her to the side. She sighed. If it had been anyone else...but Karla was the Territory Queen. Sometimes discretion was the better part of valor. "Like I said earlier, I would prefer to keep my private life private. I'm not going to lie and sneak around and hide, but I don't need to advertise either."

"Some people will need to know," Karla said. "Galen is going to wonder why I suddenly need a guard day and night."

Jastian laughed. "As long as he doesn't ask for reports in the morning." She hesitated. "Other people are going to know as well," she finally said. "Servants, especially. And they talk. And then they talk to servants in other houses and gossip spreads quick."

Karla's icy blue eyes met hers evenly. "My servants are free to talk between themselves at will. But they know the consequences of gossiping outside the home." The cold outside couldn't match the chill in Karla's eyes and tone, making a little shiver run through Jastian. Trained by Lucivar and tested by combat, Jastian thought. Her servants are loyal because they know she is fair and kind...and ruthless with disloyalty.

Then Karla's eyes thawed and she smiled again. "I'm not worried about the servants," she said. "My housekeeper has hinted at me too many times that I need to take a lover. Even Cook has muttered about knowing all sorts of special receipies for dinners for two. My household wants me to be happy." She gave Jastian a wicked grin that would terrify anyone who had known her as an adolescent. "Of course, that means you're going to be in for it the first time we have a fight."

"Already planning our first fight?" Jastian said, obviously amused.

Karla laughed. "From what I hear, we have to fight every now and then so that we can enjoy the kiss and make up part later," she said wrapping her arms around Jastian's neck.

Jastian grinned, "Well, how about we practice that part now and work on the fighting later," she said, letting her hands start wandering.

Karla's only reply was a sigh as she melted into Jastian's arms.

It was late morning when they returned to Karla's residence. Karla had let Galen know they were well and would be on their way back after breakfast. The man sounded like he was on the edge of a nervous breakdown. Karla would have been amused except she knew that if something had happened to her, Galen would have had to answer to Lucivar, and no person in his right mind would want to answer to Lucivar.

Galen was pacing the main hall when Karla and Jastian swept in. The man looked like he'd been drug through Hell by the Hounds.

"Kiss kiss," Karla greeted.

"Lady," Galen greeted through clenched teeth. Karla gave him a grin that would make a man's blood run cold. It wasn't a vicious grin. It was sweet and innocent. Anyone who knew Karla and saw that grin knew to take cover.

"Oh, don't get snarly," Karla said. "I was…perfectly taken care of."

Galen wasn't a man that missed much. And he didn't miss the glance between Karla and Jastian. It wasn't a look between a Queen and guard, or even friends for that matter. His daughter had recently acquired her first boyfriend, and the looks she gave the young man when she didn't think anyone was looking was the same look Karla had given to Jastian. His eyes narrowed on them.

"Lady there are still those who supported the changes your uncle tried to force on this land," Galen said.

Karla let out a little huff of a breath. "Will you calm down if I promise to go upstairs and have a bath and something to eat?"

The Queen's triangle had privileges that no other man in the court had. They had access to the Queen at all times, and more often than not, they were the men that would set down their heels and force the Queen to do what was good for her. So long as Protocol was being followed, a good Queen knew when to yield in order to calm down riled males. Karla knew she had pushed her luck pretty far.

"Of course, Lady," Galen said. He gave Jastian a hard look. "Lady Jastian, your report in my office."

*Don't let him climb all over your ass* Karla said on a psychic thread.

*That'll be your job later* Most people wouldn't have noticed, but Karla's cheeks tinged pink as she climbed the stairs to her suite.

Jastian followed Galen to the Steward's office. The Steward was waiting for her, and neither man was happy. The Steward, a middle-aged Prince, sat behind a large desk. Galen sat in the other chair, leaving Jastian standing. She recognized the formality of the situation and understood she was being evaluated for disciplinary measures. Her chin lifted slightly, and she stood quietly, her posture indicating that she wasn't going to be apologizing for her actions the day before. To Jastian's mind, leaving was the right thing to do considering how close to the killing edge she had been when she first came back from Terreille. She knew what kind of punishments guards had risked in Terreille when they went against a Queen, or one of her court. Jastian couldn't quite get a sense of what the men in the room were going to do, and that was making her nervous. She didn't want to hide behind Karla, but she sure as Hell wasn't going to let herself get injured because the court hadn't been strong enough to hold the Queen.

"You are aware of the situation in Glacia?" Prince Marne asked. "That there are those who would remove Karla as Queen by whatever means they possess?"

"Yes," Jastian replied. She had decided she wasn't going to jump ahead. She'd answer their questions, no more, no less.

"And yet you drew the Queen far away from her court and guards?"

Jastian's eyebrows rose. "_I_ didn't do anything. I needed to be alone, so I went into the mountains."

"You didn't send the Queen back," Galen said quietly.

"I told her to go," Jastian said. "Karla didn't want to." Jastian's eyes met Galen's. "And none of us here are capable of making a Gray-Jeweled Queen do something she doesn't want to do."

"You could have come back. She would have come with you."

"No," Jastian said too softly. "I couldn't come back." _Not if you all wanted to live_. The words were unspoken, but understood. A combat trained Black Widow wearing a Red Jewel could have done horrific damage had she been forced back before she could step all the way back from the killing edge.

"Lady," Prince Marne said, "Karla's strength was needed to save Glacia from becoming a nightmare," he said quietly. "And it's still needed. Many of those who supported Hobert were killed in the Purge, but there are many left who supported him. They blame Karla because they will never hold power in a land ruled by Protocol. There is simply no other Queen that has the power and connections to hold the land. And that is why we must protect Karla as one would a priceless treasure."

If the man had screamed at her for an hour, he wouldn't have been able to flay her better than those few calm sentences. Jastian swallowed hard. "I understand, sir."

Galen went to speak, but then lifted a finger. His eyes, and the Steward's, unfocused slightly as they were communicated with on a psychic thread. Jastian didn't know what was said, but Galen turned white, then red and Marne just wheezed. They both stared at Jastian for a long moment. Galen swallowed, made a strange noise, swallowed again, and finally said, "Karla wishes to see you."

Jastian accepted the dismissal, bowed, and left the office, pretending not to notice the Green aural shield that slapped around the Steward's office the second the door closed. She could have pushed through the shield and listened in, but the Queen had asked for her. Was it a Queen's command or a lover's request? Jastian headed up the stairs to Karla's suite, wondering which it was. Had Karla thought about things? Changed her mind? Jastian knew she was coloring Karla with another woman's actions, but it was hard not to be afraid. Trista hadn't been the first woman to change her mind in the light of day.

The door was unlocked and Jastian went into Karla's sitting room. There was a soft splashing sound in the bathroom and she went to the bathroom door. Karla was in the bathtub, bubbles up to her nose. Her eyes opened and she smiled at Jastian. "They weren't too rough on you were they?" she asked.

"They didn't have time to get going before you asked for me," Jastian replied. "What did you say to make them turn so many interesting colors?"

Karla's grin turned absolutely feral. "I told them that if they were done berating my lover, to please ask her to come to my room."

That certainly answers a lot of questions, Jastian thought. Karla's smile changed, becoming almost shy. She moved the bubbles a little with her hand. "You know," she said, "there's lots of room in here, and you were out in the cave all night too." Her cheeks turned pink and she looked down.

Jastian grinned. Who would have thought Karla could be shy about anything? But then again, she had never had a real lover before, and wasn't exactly an accomplished flirt. She gave Karla a sensual smile and vanished her clothes before slipping into the tub with her.

The next few days were spent in a sensual daze for Karla. There were the Winsol celebrations during the day and far more personal celebrations at night. The servants all quickly realized what was happening. Some were shocked, more that Karla had taken a lover at all more than who she had selected. Most were pleased that Karla had found happiness, but there were some that were downright scandalized. But one thing they all agreed on was that Karla had been happier in the last few days than she had ever been in her life.

Karla had planned on formally introducing Jastian as her lover to the coven and the boyos when they all met for Winsol. She had wanted to enjoy Jastian all to herself for just a bit before exposing her to the extended family. She knew that they would be surprised, well, some of them, Uncle Saetan not so much, but they would all be happy for her. Karla had slept comfortably in Jastian's arms, more at peace than she had ever been before in her life.

Until the night Lucivar barged into the bedroom and saw Karla and Jastian in bed together.


End file.
